Posts By Author » Unicorn Jones

Senate Dems Want Subsidies Defeated – The Wrong Ones.
27 Mar 2012 11:56 am

In the midst of record high gas prices, which threaten the President’s re-election chances more than anything (other than perhaps his decision to sell out our missile defense system to Russia for two cases of vodka and a promise not to attack Canada until we’re ready to invade from the other side), you would think that Senate Democrats wouldn’t be making a tax increase on the oil and gas industries their main focus. Higher taxes on oil and gas companies would necessarily mean higher oil and gas prices, which would, …

Even Dems Think Obama Has a Hand in Rising Gas Prices
7 Mar 2012 2:03 pm

Everyone’s favorite MSNBC’s program, Morning Joe, recently had an interesting debate over President Obama’s calls for increased taxes on oil and gas companies, because if you can’t trust MSNBC to discuss it, who can you trust? Thinking, perhaps, that someone who ran as Obama’s pod-clone, would demonstrate just how Dear Leader planned to rescue all of us from certain gasoline pump doom by creating alternative energies out of thin air, unicorn farts and algae, they welcomed former Congressmen Harold Ford Jr. (D-TN) .
Little did they know, they called on the …

So it turns out a lot of people like the Keystone pipeline
1 Feb 2012 11:34 am

Its sort of fun hammering this home. I have to be honest. Here’s a President who, in his State of the Union speech claims that he is doing everything in his power to ensure that American people – and especially those blue-collar American workers who are so essential to his re-election – are headed back to work after a long and tiresome economic downturn, and then turns around and rejects a $7 billion energy infrastructure project that not only did most of America want, but the unions, who are made …

John Boehner Actually Bests a Union
23 Jan 2012 2:31 pm

There isn’t that much good news these days, so when it happens, you have to give John Boehner credit for not totally screwing up everything he touches. Last week, despite the overwhelming pressure from the Obama Administration to make any and every bill that goes through Congress as union-friendly as possible, Boehner struck a deal with Senate Leader Harry Reid to toughen the rules in place for airline workers and railroad workers that might want to form a union under pressure from national thug bosses.
In other words, the Republicans actually …

Disney Is Not A Fan of Your Freedom to Gamble Unless Its With Them
11 Jan 2012 12:11 pm

Florida is considering a bill right now that would allow people tired of being exposed to giant cartoon mice to instead blow their hard-earned cash on slot machines and table poker games carefully located within pleasant yet confusing environments. Starved for money and unable – or unwilling – to earn it from taxing it’s geriatric population into oblivion, Florida is looking to approve “destination casinos” similar to the ones in Atlantic City or Las Vegas, so that adults who have no desire to spend their money hand over fist in …

Even Obama’s Friends Can’t Stand Him
9 Dec 2011 10:46 am

Back in the early part of this year, Barack Obama called all his friends to the White House in a desperate bid to pick their brains. You see, America doesn’t happen to be gaining jobs. Sure, there was the one jobs report that was kind of awesome because half the country felt so awful about the job market that they totally gave up and just claimed real estate for their cardboard box on the side of the highway, but otherwise, he’s been pretty awful at putting Americans back to work.
When …

Environmentalists Have a Brand New Target: Phone Books
15 Nov 2011 11:02 am

Across this great nation, environmental groups have been waging a war. A long war. A hot war. A war on that great menace to society, that irrepressible environmental monster that tortures our very existence, that tree-wasting behemoth that haunts their very nightmares, that booster seat for short people who drive really big cars: the Yellow Pages.
But learning that about the Yellow Pages takes a bit of research–research that liberal city councils across the country aren’t doing as they undertake a massive war on what they deem not only an irrepressible …

When All Else Fails, Tax the Internet!
9 Nov 2011 12:28 pm

You’ve already taxed cigarettes, bagels, sugar, salt, things that move, things that don’t move, things that move sideways on Thursdays, people who disagree with you and small mammals. So what’s left? Well, why if it isn’t the Internet! There’s something that’s failed to bend to the will of Congress on regular occasions. Some might even say it regularly defeats them.
Which explains why they want to tax and regulate it, naturally.
According to Friday’s post on The Hill’s hilariously named technology blog, Hillicon Valley, that’s the view, at least, of Massachusetts Democrat …

Even Dems Think Obama’s Regulations are Stupid
3 Nov 2011 11:40 am

When you’re trying to help the economy recover, the smartest thing to do would be to make it as easy as possible for Americans to start and run their own small businesses, no? I mean, look, if corporate America isn’t hiring and the government can’t afford the workers it has now, the only option is to help Joe Six-Pack expand his dry cleaning business in the middle of Nebraska, because, let’s face it, he’s the only one actually working in this economy.
But noooooooooooooo.
“When I started the business, I’d very rarely …

Occupy Houston Finally Shuts The Hell Up
18 Oct 2011 11:32 am

What does it take to get an entire OccupyWhatever group to be quiet for one God-forsaken minute? Apparently, just give them the idea that the best way to protest something is to have a “rally of silence.”
Members of Occupy Houston will rally in silent protest at Energy Day on Saturday October 15, 2011.
Energy Day is sponsored the big oil companies responsible for the BP oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico and for building the Keystone XL Pipeline, a potential serious environmental disaster running from Alberta, Canada right into our …

Supercommittee to Consider Dropping the Paper Dollar
12 Oct 2011 3:41 pm

Last I checked, the Congressional supercommittee was charged with bringing down the national debt through a series of common sense budget cuts over the next decade. Although I’ve been in politics almost ten years, and living in reality slightly longer than that, I still held out hope that somewhere there was a Congressperson appointed to this committee that valued reason and was willing to lead the supercommittee to genuine cuts, which would save America a great deal of money in the long run. Yes, I’m an idiot. But I had …

OccupyDC’s Buddies Costing Americans Jobs
11 Oct 2011 10:59 am

Hippies really are magical things. Reality just doesn’t apply to them. But give them a “cause” and seventeen pages of someone’s Masters thesis on how capitalism appears to be ruining their jobless lives, and they’ll take to the streets by the thousands, chanting and hoisting giant papier-mache globes and inscrutable signs featuring giant red Communist stars. They don’t even need to know what the protest is for, just that it gives them something to do while they figure out how to ask their parents for more money.
Sometimes, this benefits America …

Doctors to EPA: You’re Full of…errr…Pollution
6 Oct 2011 2:40 pm

By now, you’ve probably heard that, if the EPA had it’s way, they’d shut down every coal power plant in the country and replace it with tenderly-gardened patchouli fields and useless, circular solar panels that hippies will dance around in the moonlight, chanting and wearing nothing but copies of the Clean Air Act. Despite what President Obama might have said at this morning’s press conference of course, recent EPA actions along these lines will have a disastrous effect on the economy as America’s major industries struggle to retrofit their plants …

The Next Gen of Lefty Journos?
23 Sep 2011 2:38 pm

No one can honestly believe the New York Times is an unbiased and impartial source for your daily dose of news. I mean, sure, the bizarre alternative reality you’d need to subscribe to to fully digest that as truth would be very similar to the kind of alternative reality you’d need to subscribe to to be a repeat Obama voter, so we can clearly see where their remaining reader’s allegiance lies, but seriously.
So, it only makes sense that while reporting on potential natural gas drilling to take place in New …

A TRAIN Act to Stop a Train Wreck?
20 Sep 2011 11:39 am

The Obama Administration’s environmental policy is a hot mess.
It’s like someone sent a copy of the kids version of 50 Simple Things You Can Do To Save the Earth to a bunch of college professors in an English lit department and let them figure out how to best implement simple policy using all of the Communism they can muster. Why stop at legislation when you can issue dictates from on high? Why attempt to preserve jobs and allow the free market to develop and perfect alternative fuel sources when you …

Don’t Touch Those Dem Voter Mills!
7 Sep 2011 1:20 pm

Over the last six months, the Obama Administration has been almost obsessively concerned with knocking for-profit colleges and universities down a peg. Apparently, when you teach reliable job skills to students for an affordable price, trade on the stock exchange and operate at the whims of the free market, you are a complete and total threat to the well being of education and the kids who pursue it.
Back in July, the Administration and its buddies in the Department of Education knocked career colleges with what they thought was a final, …

Lawyers Already Debating Voter Rights?
7 Sep 2011 11:57 am

We’re still a year out of the election, but don’t think that we’ve fallen behind on what really matters in November of 2012. Apparently, Democratic lawyers are already gearing up their objections to Voter ID and other voter protection laws that have come on the books since the voter fraud disasters of 2008.
Now, not every city is Chicago, where the dead rise in huge numbers to turn out for Election Day, but nearly every state experienced some form of voter fraud activity during the first Presidential election, with the alleged …

Obama Tries To Regulate Out of Recession
15 Aug 2011 11:00 am

This sort of got lost in all of the excitement over Iowa last week, but lest we lose an opportunity to point out that our Commander in Chief couldn’t govern himself out of an economic crisis disguised as a wet paper bag, I wanted to make sure everyone knew. Not that everyone doesn’t already know. But you know what I mean. He’s ass-backwards and he’s not going to stop inflicting his self-styled insanity on us until every last American has a job, goddamit.
But he does have a jobs plan – …

Obama Back to Punishing the Rich
19 Jul 2011 10:19 am

Just in case you thought that the “corporate jet owners” were the only ones who are being publicly shamed by the Obama administration for being successful entrepreneurs, it looks like Obama and his buddies at the New York Times are pushing for a second front in the War on Success. In order to raise $20 billion quickly, they’re looking to close the “carried interest loophole” – a “loophole” that allows investors who make long-term risks to carry interest on their loans as long-term capital gains instead of getting taxed on …

ACLU Hearts Freedom…Sometimes
13 May 2011 11:36 am

It’s always fun to pick on the ACLU. I mean, let’s just look at a few of it’s greatest hits from the past week and half, shall we?

In case you were wondering whether you can ask the state to let you change your gender on your birth certificate, just whenever you feel like it, you can’t. In order to switch genders, you totally have to have…ahem…the correct parts for that gender or the state doesn’t see fit to declare you. This seems to be a good policy, since, you never …

Who Is Brett Kimberlin?

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