A Pen, a Phone, and a Scepter

People were tired of America. It just wasn’t cool anymore. They decided it would be much trendier to be like most of the rest of the world – that is, to live in a perpetually depressed collectivist hellhole under the heel of a self-interested dictator. So they let the cultural Marxists who run the media talk them into electing the classic other, Barack Hussein Obama. Credit where it’s due — Obama is giving them what they asked for:

President Obama seems ready to work around Congress in 2014, telling reporters before his first Cabinet meeting of the year Tuesday that he stood ready to use two tools, a pen and a phone, to provide [collectivist misery and oppression] for Americans.

“We are not just going to be waiting for legislation in order to make sure that we’re providing Americans the [kick in the teeth they deserve]. I’ve got a pen, and I’ve got a phone. And I can use that pen to sign executive orders and take executive actions and administrative actions that [quack quack quack],” the president said.

It isn’t just because they were white men and owned slaves that liberals despise the Founding Fathers. What really sticks in their craw is that Jefferson, Madison, et al. foresaw that eventually our culture might decay to the point a Barack Obama could be elected president. They designed a system to allow us to weather such a presidency without degenerating into a dictatorship, until such time as we can recover our senses and our character.

This system works largely by dividing power between the branches of government. Obama is stating plain as the unsightly mole on his face that he plans to run roughshod over the primary brake on executive power, the legislative branch. He is essentially declaring his hostility to the Constitution he swore an oath to serve, and to the American way of government. No one should be surprised by this, least of all his implicitly anti-American supporters.

High on the emerging dictator’s agenda are extending unemployment benefits indefinitely (i.e., expanding the vast number of Americans who vote instead of work for a living) and opening the Third World floodgates the rest of the way with amnesty (so as to permanently alter the country’s demographics). Both initiatives are intended to “fundamentally transform” America, so that recovering our character will no longer be an option.

For the time being, the weight of America’s destiny rests on Johnny Boehner’s slumped shoulders. If he doesn’t put up a hell of a fight, Congress will be steamrolled into irrelevance, and “Hope & Change” will be the title of America’s final chapter.


On tips from Artfldr, Fawn Liebowitz Memorial Society, Ben S, Stormfax, and Torsten Ostermann. Cross-posted at Moonbattery.

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