The KKK Does Public Relations


This story just struck me as absurdly funny. I think it’s because the KKK is protesting one of the very few groups that are even less popular than it is.

As President Obama honored fallen soldiers at Arlington National Cemetery on Monday, three members of the Westboro Baptist Church protested the ceremony, holding signs that read “Pray for more dead soldiers” and “God hates your prayers,” as the controversial group has become known to do. They were met by about 70 counterprotesters, including members from a group just as contentious as the church: the Ku Klux Klan.

Dennis LaBonte, who told CNN he was a military veteran and the “imperial wizard” of a KKK chapter, said the approximately 10 members of the group came in “support of the troops.” LaBonte, who said he’s not a “hate-monger,” said he “thinks that it’s an absolute shame that [the WBC] show up and disrupt people’s funerals.” The group was cordoned off in a separate area and reportedly “drew little attention.”

That is just HILARIOUS. The next step, however, for the KKK is to take some advice from the “Chef Goes Nanners” episode of South Park.

KKK Leader: Alright brothers, listen up! [two more members show up, and the leader starts to pace back and forth] As you know, this fine city is holding a vote on whether or not to change their flag. But lynching minorities is history! So what are we gonna do about it?!

Member 1: Let’s say that if they change the flag, we’ll burn down the Capitol!

KKK Members: Yeah!

Member 2: Let’s say that if they change the flag, we’ll never leave this town!

KKK Members: Yeah!

Jimbo: [in KKK disguise] Let’s say they should change the flag!

KKK Members: Yeah! [turn to see the new member] Wah?

KKK Leader: Uh what’s that, brother?

Jimbo: I think we should switch sides!

Ned: Me too. Nnn-that’s a good idea.

Jimbo: Look, we have to accept the fact that most people in the world hate us, right?

KKK Members: [rolling reaction] Yeah, m-hm.

Jimbo: So, whatever side we’re on is the side that’s gonna lose, right?

KKK Members: [rolling reaction] Right, yeah.

Jimbo: So why don’t we all say that we want the flag changed. That way, most folks’ll vote to keep it the way it is.

KKK Leader: That’s a great idea, brother!

KKK Members: [jubilant, jumping] Yeah!

KKK Leader: Alright, it is decided! We will officially tell everyone that we want the flag changed, so that they will all vote against us!

So hey, KKK, protest Arizona’s anti-illegal immigration hate laws and the racists who are against our President. Then, next thing you know, the KKK will be as acceptable with Democrats as other left-of-center hate groups like MEChA and the Nation of Islam.

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