We May Now Have The Best Explanation Yet For The Hiring Of Eric Holder

At what point do you: go so far past diversity that you’re just being quirky? The Department of Justice is certainly testing those limits with its hiring practices.

The PJ Tatler has obtained documents from the Justice Department detailing efforts to recruit attorneys and staff who are dwarfs or who have “psychiatric disabilities” or “severe intellectual disabilities.” On May 31, 2012, Assistant Attorney General Tom Perez issued a directive to affirmatively recruit people with these “targeted disabilities.”

This DOJ policy does not merely involve prohibitions against discrimination, but rather the documents reveal deliberate recruitment efforts to hire as attorneys and staff for the Department of Justice people suffering from psychiatric disorders and intellectual disabilities. Moreover, applicants can “self-identify” their disability by means of the “Standard Form 256, Self Identification Disability.”

Those with “targeted disabilities” may be hired through a “non-competitive” appointment. That means they don’t have to endure the regular civil service competition among applicants, but can be plucked from the stack of resumes and hired immediately instead.

According to the documents, those with these “targeted disabilities” may be hired “before the position is advertised” and even “before the position’s closing date.” Moreover, lawyers with psychiatric disabilities and “severe intellectual” disabilities receive a waiver from the requirement that a new DOJ employee have practiced law for one year before being hired.

A lawyer with: “severe intellectual” disabilities: who hasn’t even been practicing law for a year? When you consider that most government employees do their jobs like they have“severe intellectual” disabilities: already, it’s pretty scary to think that they’re hiring people who actually have: “severe intellectual” disabilities.: Moreover, having: “severe intellectual” disabilities: is apparently so important that they don’t even need the minimum amount of legal experience that the DOJ normally requires. Can you imagine dealing with these people?

Caller to the DOJ:: “Hello, I’m calling because I believe that I may have been discriminated against, but I do have to admit it’s a complicated case. I’m 58 years and I was just replaced by a much younger Hispanic man. On the one hand, that does make the company more diverse, but on the other hand, my boss implied that he was letting me go because of my age. Would I have a valid case?”

DOJ Lawyer:: “Duhhhhr! I like turkeys! They make a funny sound!!!”

This doesn’t seem to make a lot of sense, but maybe this explains Eric Holder and why he’s trying to give back to the program that made it possible for such a complete incompetent to ever run the Department of Justice.

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