You Might Be A Democrat
You might be a Democrat if you believe…
- Fighting against government-subsidized contraceptives constitutes a “war on women,” but when Islamists stone a woman to death because she was raped, it is just “cultural differences.”
- The Second Amendment only guarantees the people’s right to own a musket, yet viewing Internet pornography in a public library is protected by the First.
- Teaching multiple origin theories in public schools is an abhorrent dilution of science curriculum, but in history class, class time should focus on the contributions of homosexuals and ethnic minorities.
- Teenagers should be able to get contraceptives or abortions without a parent’s permission, but sodas and other sugary drinks should be banned.
- Only white people can be racist.
- Raising taxes on cigarettes will discourage people from smoking, but raising income taxes and extending unemployment benefits won’t discourage people from working.
- The Broken Window Theory sounds like sound economic policy.
- Water-boarding terrorists to get intelligence on impending attacks is abhorrent, but cutting up unborn babies inside the womb is just a “choice.”
- Sarah Palin actually uttered the words “I can see Russia from my house.”
- Mitt Romney is an ultra-conservative right-wing ideologue.
- The Government is controlled by corporate special interests, but that same government should pass sweeping new laws any time there is a crisis.
- A 2,000 page law that spawned 20,000 pages of red tape in just 3 years is a good start at reforming America’s broken health care system.
- The 2009 Stimulus Bill didn’t work because it just didn’t spend enough money.
- The “AR” in “AR-15” stands for “Assault Rifle.”
- Raising the debt ceiling under George W. Bush represented a horrible failure of leadership, but when President Obama wants to raise the debt ceiling, it is necessary for the nation’s economic viability.
- Hard-line Islamic terrorists are just the misunderstood byproducts of American colonialism.
- The Tea Party is just a group of racist, homophobic anarchists who are non-violent…so far.
- A daily moment of silence in public schools constitutes “an establishment of religion,” yet restricting a valedictorian from mentioning her faith in a graduation speech does not prohibit “free exercise.”
- The National Rifle Association is directly responsible for the actions of every crazed mass murderer in the modern era.
- The First Amendment includes women’s right to get an abortion, but the Second Amendment does not protect the people’s right to keep and bear arms from government infringement.
- Teaching kids to use contraceptives with known failure rates is a better way to stop teenage pregnancy than teaching abstinence.
- Sarah Palin was responsible for the shooting of Gabrielle Giffords, but the Southern Poverty Law Center had no role in the shooting at the Family Research Council.
- The National Rifle Association is responsible for the recent mass shootings in America.
- The United States should model its health care system after England, Canada, or Cuba.
- The U.S. Government does not have a spending problem.
- Enforcing the death penalty for convicted murderers is “cruel and unusual,” but sex-selective abortions should not be judged.
- It’s still Bush’s fault.
Absurd as it may sound, the most immediate threat to our constitutional liberties is not the adolescent Marxist in the
This Thursday, January 22, hundreds of thousands will march in Washington, DC in the annual March for Life. This notes