Moonbat Tech: Woolen Coffins


Where moonbats are concerned, nothing is sacred except moonbattery itself. This is why even the burial of the dead can be made into a mockery without disturbing the smug smiles on glassy-eyed liberal faces. The latest eco-fad — woolen coffins:

Thanks to a growing demand for green funerals in Britain, Hainsworth’s Natural Legacy caskets — each woven from the fleece of three sheep and capable of holding 840 lb. (380 kg) — have begun to carve out a share of the U.K.’s coffin market….

The idea for woolen coffins was inspired by government’s longstanding habit of intrusive meddling:

A marketing student who was interning for Adam Hainsworth discovered that in 1667, Parliament — hoping to bolster the textile industry — passed a law requiring all corpses be buried in a woolen shroud. Good idea, Hainsworth thought, though clearly in this day and age something sturdier would be required. So with the help of a funeral director he knew, he built a prototype casket — bulked up with recycled cardboard….

A farmer who uses wool waste for fertilizer provides an endorsement. In Hainsworth’s words, wool “does rot down fairly well,” just like the dear departed.

The point of this tasteless idiocy, as with all things green-washed, is parting fools from their money:

Retail prices for Hainsworth’s woolen coffins range from $960 to $1,290, a bit more than the $800 average cost for a standard wooden coffin in Britain.

In addition to knitting woolen coffins, Hainsworth apparently holds séances:

Hainsworth is confident that strong word of mouth from satisfied customers will also help open the U.S. market to its fluffy creations.

Won’t someone please think of the historically disadvantaged sheep, forced through animal oppression to surrender their wool to the dead?

woolen_coffin.jpg
Imagine if your grandma started knitting one of these.

On a tip from J. Cross-posted at Moonbattery.

Trending Today

Related Articles

49

Amateur Hour In The White House: Obama Ticks Off The Brits

One of the things we heard over and over during the 2008 campaign was that we needed a skillful diplomat

5

Climate Alarmist: Gee, Maybe We Shouldn’t Have Hung Our Hat Solely On CO2

Geoffrey Lean at the Telegraph is just asking for a beat down from the rest of the True Believers (who

64

Nanny State Wins: Light Bulb Ban Repeal Fails in House

If the House Republicans can’t even get rid of one of the most odious examples of nanny statism in the