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Prehistoric Climate Change Deniers Started Both Global Warming and Global Cooling by Oppressing Mammoths
Written By : Dave Blount

If you follow through on environmentalist ideology, it isn’t only modern man who is evil and must be scrubbed from the planet — it’s the entire human race. Even noble savages were a blemish before the eyes of Gaia. For example, cavemen started global warming by hunting mammoths:

Mammoths used to roam modern-day Russia and North America, but are now extinct — and there’s evidence that around 15,000 years ago, early hunters had a hand in wiping them out. A new study, accepted for publication in Geophysical Research Letters, a journal of the American Geophysical Union (AGU), argues that this die-off had the side effect of heating up the planet.

This one required scholars to twist their brains into entirely new contortions:

First, mammoth populations began to drop — both because of natural climate change as the planet emerged from the last ice age, and because of human hunting. Normally, mammoths would have grazed down any birch that grew, so the area stayed a grassland. But if the mammoths vanished, the birch could spread. …

The trees would change the color of the landscape, making it much darker so it would absorb more of the Sun’s heat, in turn heating up the air. This process would have added to natural climate change, making it harder for mammoths to cope, and helping the birch spread further.

What was that about natural climate change? They were almost starting to make sense for a moment.

Bad enough our eco-insensitive ancestors started global warming by oppressing the noble mammoths when they could have eaten alfalfa sprouts and tofu instead. What’s worse is that they also started global cooling the same way:

Extinction of mammoths, camels, giant sloths and other large mammals in the New World may have cooled the global climate about 11,500 years ago, suggest paleobiologists.

The culprit? Less of the greenhouse gas, methane, emitted by the massive herbivores.

But the ultimate culprit, as always these days, is the human race:

“About 13,400 years ago, the Americas were heavily populated with large-bodied herbivores,” says the study in the current Nature Geosciences study led by biologist Felisa Smith of the University of New Mexico in Albuquerque. “However, by 11,500 years ago and within 1,000 years of the arrival of humans in the New World, 80% of these large-bodied mammals were extinct.” …

“We are not the first to suggest that human-mediated activities influenced the planet prior to the industrial age… Although still controversial, the megafaunal extinction is the earliest catastrophic event attributed to human activities,” conclude the Nature Geosciences study authors.

The usual conclusion can be drawn: the clueless “experts” on climate change don’t know much of anything except that they don’t like human beings. But according to our rulers, that’s no reason not to surrender our standard of living and the last of our liberties in the name of combating the imaginary menace.

hunting-mammoth.jpg
If only Big Government had been there to make them leave the poor mammoths alone.

On a tip from Oiao. Hat tip: Watts Up With That? Cross-posted at Moonbattery.

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  • UFKA_Smithwick

    So to “cure” global warming we need to clear cut forests and wipe out large mammalian species?

    Ok, I'll get my chainsaw-shotgun that I've been working on. We can BBQ some grizzly bear over a redwood fire.

    Don't you dare call me a hero though, I'm just doing my part. (I will however accept the cash prize associated with a nobel peace prize).

    • StanW

      BBQ Grizzly Bear? Yum!

      I'll bring the beer!

      • UFKA_Smithwick

        I just feel bad for the folks who got stuck painting moutains instead.

        They should have waited for this study to come out before deciding to help.

        I am also commissioning a study to fully explain the environmental benefits of drinking beer by the pool and grilling baby back ribs. It will revolutionize the way we think about global warming. (there's also something about blowjobs in there, but I need to do a lot more research)

        • StanW

          Finally, a 'scientific' study I can get behind.

          And as far as your last statement goes, I see no need to bring Bill Clinton into this!

  • http://conservativebootcamp.com Martin Hale

    So according to this team of scientists, human populations in northern climes changed the climate of the planet.

    I got to wondering just how many actual people then it took to change the climate of the planet. So with a bit of digging, I was able to learn that at around 12,000 years ago there were approximately 5 million humans. But that source also indicated that most of them were living in the Middle and Near East. Just doing some rough guessing, I surmised that there might have been as many as 1 million humans in North America at the time, and perhaps another 1 million in Siberia, Russia and Northern Europe.

    So according to these folks, it only took maybe 2 million human individuals to alter global climate. Damn, those are some powerful people – they make us look like pikers in comparison. It's taking 6.6 billion of us several years just to push CO2 levels up a measly 5 parts per million which has negligible effect on climate. But back then, only 2 million of us made the whole planet both warmer and cooler.

    Gotta respect those early humans, eh?

    • the_hawk

      Nicely done, Martin.

    • UFKA_Smithwick

      An interesting conundrum arises here.

      Should these people be condemned?

      On the one hand they caused global climate change and mass extinctions. But they were living as Gore et al would have us live, close to the land, no technology, worshipping nature.

      And even more confusing: some of them are white, so evil. But others were native american, so saints.

      Tough call.

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