Michelle Obama’s Mandates Create Black Market for Salt at School Cafeterias

by Dave Blount | June 25, 2015 3:25 pm

Try as they might, liberal authoritarians will never destroy the capitalist impulse. It is innate:

Children are creating their own black markets to trade and sell salt due to First Lady Michelle Obama’s school lunch rules.

During a hearing before the House Subcommittee on Early Childhood, Elementary, and Secondary Education, chaired by Rep. Todd Rokita (R., Ind.), a school administrator told Congress of the “unintended consequences” of the Healthy, Hunger-Free Kids Act.

“Perhaps the most colorful example in my district is that students have been caught bringing–and even selling–salt, pepper, and sugar in school to add taste to perceived bland and tasteless cafeteria food,” said John S. Payne, the president of Blackford County School Board of Trustees in Hartford City, Indiana. …

Payne noted other problems with the “one-size-fits-all” approach to providing healthier meals to students, including fewer kids participating in the program and higher food waste.

Surprise surprise. One-size-fits-all centrally mandated uniformity doesn’t work. Any student of Soviet history could have told them that.

Payne also said school fundraisers like bake sales, have been canceled due to the rules, and “whole-grain items and most of the broccoli end up in the trash” in his district.

Dr. Lynn Harvey agreed that the whole-grain requirement is not working, as kids refuse to eat dense and dry biscuits, and “unpalatable” grits.

“When it comes to whole grain-rich variations of biscuits, grits, crackers and cornbread, all too often, students simply toss them into the trash cans,” said Harvey, who serves as chief of school nutrition services at the North Carolina Department of Public Instruction, which oversees lunch programs for schools that enroll 1.5 million students.

The solution is obvious. Ban all foods that do not comply with Michelle Obama’s specifications so that children will be eager to eat school lunches no matter how awful they taste. As for the speculators selling salt and pepper, get them on a train for Siberia.

Government food.

On tips from Rob E and Lyle. Cross-posted at Moonbattery.

Endnotes:
  1. @BarackObama: https://twitter.com/BarackObama
  2. #ThanksMichelleObama: https://twitter.com/hashtag/ThanksMichelleObama?src=hash
  3. pic.twitter.com/GLJwZxRcU5: http://t.co/GLJwZxRcU5
  4. December 12, 2014: https://twitter.com/lunchsucksobama/status/543249836401639424

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