Suspended for Gun Trinket the Size of a Quarter
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Firearms are symbolic of the empowerment of the individual. That’s why liberals react to them the way Dracula reacts to the Cross — and why the zero tolerance hoplophobia of government school educrats continues to plumb the depths of totalitarian absurdity:
Yet another student has landed in trouble for having something that represents a gun, but isn’t actually anything like a real gun.
This time, the student is 12-year-old Joseph Lyssikatos, a student in advanced math who had perfect attendance last year. The seventh-grader made the mistake of bringing a ridiculously small, silver keychain shaped like a gun to Alan Shawn Feinstein Middle School in Coventry, R.I, reports local NBC affiliate WJAR.
The two-inch keychain fell out of Lyssikatos’s backpack while he was at school.
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Buy NowAfter another kid picked it up and displayed it to other students, a teacher intervened and impounded the keychain.
Apparently fearing that the roughly quarter-sized hunk of cheap metal was somehow a danger to life and limb, school officials sprang into action. They suspended Lyssikatos for three days. He has also been banned from an upcoming class field trip. …
The boy’s father, Keith Bonanno, claimed on WPRO radio that the behavioral specialist [who informed him of the suspension on behalf of the school] told him his son was “lucky that he didn’t get suspended for 10 days, or even worse expelled.”
Not even this can top suspending 7-year-old Josh Welch for eating a Pop Tart into a shape that vaguely resembled a pistol.

On a tip from Rainbow Hopetopia. Cross-posted at Moonbattery.
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