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The Top 10 Things Heard At The United Nations Commission On Human Rights Since Moammar Gadaffi Took Over
by John Hawkins & Laurence Simon

Libyan leader Colonel Gadaffi is to head an international watchdog on human rights. Libya is to be elected chair of the United Nations Commission on Human Rights - despite its links with terrorism and torture. -- Sky News

10) Who could say no to this face?

9) Killing people who protest your non-democratic rule is no longer to be considered a human rights violation.

8) Improve your human rights or I'll torture your ambassador.

7) Meeting's over... fire up the margarita machine... and join the Conga Line of Death baby!

6) It takes a thief to catch a thief.

5) New Gadaffi kitchen policy: when you drink the last cup of coffee either start a new pot or be killed.

4) I ordered the deaths of 259 people in the Lockerbie bombing and they didn't p*ss me off by not improving human rights!

3) What do you mean it would look bad if we kept torturing people?

2) If you think my getting this job will make the US mad, wait until they find out Saddam Hussein has been made the UN's chief weapons inspector.

1) So I told Kofi, 'either make me head of the United Nations Commission on Human Rights or I show your wife the pics of you with the donkey."

If you liked this article, you may like some of the other material at Laurence Simon's Amish Tech Support

© Copyright 2001-2008 John Hawkins
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