The RWN Idiot Test
Do you ever wonder if you’re an idiot? Or more importantly, do you ever wonder if the good people at RWN think you’re an idiot? =D Well, take this idiot quiz and see….
1) When you go to the movie theater you should…
A) Make sure to leave your cell phone on in case you get an important call.
B) Take your colic ridden 5 month old baby with you.
C) Tell your idiot friend each upcoming plot point loudly so everyone around you can hear.
D) Shut your big stupid yap and watch the movie.
2) When driving on the freeway…
A) Make sure not to ever allow anyone to go faster than you, it makes you less of a man.
B) Drive 10 MPH under the speed limit in the left hand lane so no one can pass you.
C) Drive 25 MPH faster than the flow of traffic in an ice storm because you have an SUV.
D) Drive like a normal human being, pay attention, and drive defensively.
3) You work in a fast food restaurant. A customer orders a burger and fries….
A) Should you sneeze into your hands and continue making their food?
B) Make sure not to repeat their order back to them while hopelessly fouling it up?
C) Make the customer wait to give his order while you do some trivial task that you should do after the customer has finished ordering?
D) Take the customers order, repeat it back, thank them for there business and make sure the flunkies in the back get the order right.
4) You want to get back together with an old boyfriend who you dropped for treating you like garbage. You ask a friend their opinion. They tell you it’s a terrible idea. Should you…
A) Loudly say “I’m sorry I asked you”, storm off and never mention the boyfriend again?
B) Argue that your boyfriend loved you despite the fact that he was dating 3 other girls while dating you?
C) Get really p*ssed off at your friend and accuse them of “not knowing your ex-boyfriend” like you do?
D) Wake the Hell up and realize your old boyfriend was an @sshole.
5) You are a married, elected, official. One of your naive, 18 year old, interns starts making goo goo eyes at you and hinting that she’s yours for the asking. You should…
A) Have her give you a BJ in the oval office while discussing policy over the phone with foreign leaders.
B) Have sex with her and then ask her to sign a legally binding document swearing that it never happened.
C) Add her to the list, there’s plenty of the president to go around baby doll!
D) Have enough respect for your wife and your family to make sure that nothing is going to happen.
6) A weird sicko drowns all 5 of her children in a bathtub. Should you…
A) Write a moronic column basically saying “But for the Grace of God, there goes I.”
B) Contribute to her trust fund.
C) Blame postpartum depression and ask that she be treated for a year or two and then released.
D) Have more sympathy for the 5 kids she murdered than her and hope she stays in a cell for the rest of her life.
7) You are talking to friend on ICQ. They seem bored and disinterested in what you’re saying. Every response is something like “Yes”, “No”, or “OK”. Should you…
A) Leave them alone and go bother some of the other people on your ICQ list?
B) Start saying stupider things than normal to try to get a reaction?
C) Ask them to “Turn that frown upside down little mister?”
D) Talk about something interesting for once in your entire insipid, dull, boring life?
8) You have a newborn baby. You’re very proud of your child. When you are around your friends you should….
A) Babble endlessly about how your child’s weird idiosyncrasies are evidence of exceptional intelligence.
B) Shove 485739477984 pictures of your child in your friends faces at every opportunity.
C) Talk to anyone who’ll listen about how your hideous little child is guaranteed to win some insipid local beautiful baby.
D) Recognize that no one except your immediate family cares about your baby and shut up about it already.
9) A friend loans you $50 because you’re in a real financial pinch. You promise to pay them back next pay day. Right after you get paid you should….
A) Blow your paycheck on beer and hope your friend forgets about it.
B) Ask your friend for another $50 and promise to pay them the whole $100 back the next payday.
C) Get into a big fight with your friend when they expect their money back.
D) Stop being a bum and pay your friend back as soon as possible you deadbeat.
10) You love your cat Mr. Woogums. Should you…
A) Get Mr. Woogums a dozen little friends and be known around your neighborhood as “The Crazy Cat Lady”?
B) Call home at lunch and let the answering machine pick up so you can talk to Mr. Woogums so he won’t get lonely?
C) Buy some cute little outfits for Mr. Woogums to wear in the winter so he won’t get cold?
D) Recognize that your stupid cat would happily eat you if you were dead and get over your idiotic pet.
If you anything but D on every question, not only do you deserve to be beaten with a sack of doorknobs until you see the error of you ways, but you are an idiot….