Even Al Gore Blew Off “Earth Hour”

You may not have been aware of this, but on Saturday you were supposed to sit around in the dark for sixty minutes, starting at 8:30 PM, in order to celebrate “Earth Hour.”

Now, you may be wondering: what exactly would that accomplish? I’m not entirely sure what the answer to that question is supposed to be, but I think the general theory was that the darkness was going to inspire legions of dirt faeries to fly in, sprinkle magic Pixie dust everywhere, and that was supposed to cool the earth off — or something.

I don’t even think the people sponsoring the whole concept really know. Still, to be fair, I went over to Earth Hour HQ, so I could provide their explanation for you,

For the first time in history, people of all ages, nationalities, race and background have the opportunity to use their light switch as their vote – Switching off your lights is a vote for Earth, or leaving them on is a vote for global warming. WWF are urging the world to VOTE EARTH and reach the target of 1 billion votes, which will be presented to world leaders at the Global Climate Change Conference in Copenhagen 2009.

So, “Switching off your lights is a vote for Earth, or leaving them on is a vote for global warming,” and their goal was 1 billion people switching off their lights? Erm…I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but there are more than 6 billion people on the planet. So, even if the Earth Hour hippies met their goal, the “vote for global warming” beat them by a more than 5-to-1 margin.

Heck, even Al Gore didn’t “vote for Earth,”

I pulled up to Al’s house, located in the posh Belle Meade section of Nashville, at 8:48pm – right in the middle of Earth Hour. I found that the main spotlights that usually illuminate his 9,000 square foot mansion were dark, but several of the lights inside the house were on.

In fact, most of the windows were lit by the familiar blue-ish hue indicating that floor lamps and ceiling fixtures were off, but TV screens and computer monitors were hard at work. (In other words, his house looked the way most houses look about 1:45am when their inhabitants are distractedly watching “Cheaters” or “Chelsea Lately” reruns.)

The kicker, though, were the dozen or so floodlights grandly highlighting several trees and illuminating the driveway entrance of Gore’s mansion.

I [kid] you not, my friends, the savior of the environment couldn’t be bothered to turn off the gaudy lights that show off his goofy trees.

When the leading spokesman for the “We’ve gotta live like the Flintstones or the planet will melt” crowd lives in a mansion with multiple spotlights and floodlights illuminating his trees, I think it tells you a lot about how serious of a threat to mankind the alarmists really believe global warming is…

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