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Andy Borowitz Offers Permitted Obama Jokes
Written By : Van Helsing

Establishment comedians are afraid to poke even light-hearted fun at Obama, because they don’t want to threaten his chances of election or be denounced as racists. Some have even subjected themselves to ridicule by claiming that the Obamessiah is too flawless to make fun of. However, being perfect, Obama can withstand a few laughs. The Borowitz Report lists jokes approved by the Obama campaign for use by late night comics:

Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, “You know, we don’t get many kangaroos here.” Barack Obama replies, “At these prices, I’m not surprised. That’s why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil.”

A traveling salesman knocks on the door of a farmhouse, and much to his surprise, Barack Obama answers the door. The salesman says, “I was expecting the farmer’s daughter.” Barack Obama replies, “She’s not here. The farm was foreclosed on because of subprime loans that are making a mockery of the American Dream.”

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Why the long face?” Barack Obama replies, “His jockey just lost his health insurance, which should be the right of all Americans.”

Q: What’s black and white and red all over?
Barack Obama: The New Yorker magazine, which should be embarrassed after publishing such a tasteless and offensive cover, which I reject and denounce.

A Christian, a Jew and Barack Obama are in a rowboat in the middle of the ocean. Barack Obama says, “This joke isn’t going to work because there’s no Muslim in this boat.”

In case anyone in the entertainment industry wants to risk going off the reservation, here’s a slide show that might give them some ideas:

On a tip from Lyle. Cross-posted at Moonbattery.

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