Baghdad Delenda Est, Part Two:

Baghdad Delenda Est, Part Two: Jonah Goldberg busts out some fantastic quotes in his new column that are worth sharing…

“Should the Arab world succeed in its next attempt to wipe out Israel, that still wouldn’t be the end of our troubles. After all, Osama bin Laden didn’t care about the Palestinians until the Palestinians started cheering in the streets on September 11. And as we all learned this morning, Zacarias Moussaoui prays and fights for the destruction of Israel, the United States, and Russia as well as for the return of Muslim dominion over such places as Spain and parts of Yugoslavia. That’s a pretty hefty land-for-peace plan.”

“In the Persian Gulf War, the United States changed its mind. As chairman of the Joint Chiefs, Colin Powell reportedly urged for the cessation of hostilities before the U.S. entered Baghdad. The rationale offered not only by Powell, but by our allies in Riyadh and elsewhere, was that we would fracture the almighty coalition President Bush had assembled. Keeping the coalition, some reasoned, was more important than getting the job done. This is like telling your prom date, We’d better stop fooling around because it might result in the wasting of a condom. Whether you think our bellum interruptus was a good idea or not, justifying it for the sake of our coalition was a world-historic example of making the means more important than the ends.

Quick: Regale me with your favorite reminiscences of all the wonderful things the coalition did for the world. Pay homage to the sagacity of this decision. Who can doubt that schoolchildren will talk of the Persian Gulf coalition as the great fulcrum of human progress for millennia to come?”

“I know — from painful experience — that there are lots of people out there who subscribe to the bumper-sticker slogan “peace through strength is like virginity through f**king.” I had to argue with such folks through all of college (and much of high school). Such statements are black holes of stupidity — idiocy is crammed into such a small space that it folds upon itself and bends all reason and logic in its proximity. If peace cannot be attained through strength, I invite one of these bespectacled, purse-carrying, rice-paper-skinned, sandalistas to walk out into a prison yard. Let’s see how receptive Tiny and Mad Dog are to entreaties over the futility of violence. “Sir, there’s no need for fisticuffs, I would be glad to share my Snapple with you. Can’t you see this sort of conflict is precisely what the multinational corporations want?””

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