Blogging Tips — Satire By Frank J.

John Hawkins has put up a great set of tips for bloggers, and I’m like, “Ugh! Idiot!”

Last thing I need is more bloggers to compete with. I don’t need more upstarts like Arriana Huffington trying to shoot past me in the rankings. Still, I have some tips for you.

BLOGGING TIPS

* When coming up with a name for you blog, don’t use IMAO. That’s taken.

* It will be more stylish if you have a cool pseudonym for blogging, such as your first name followed by your middle initial.

* Don’t blog about how you hate monkeys… that’s my shtick! I’ll find you and cut you if you try and steal that!

* Don’t e-mail me about your new blog, because I don’t even read the blogs I like so why the hell will I check out yours I never heard of. Ugh! Idiots!

* You need readers, so don’t let it be known that, deep down inside, you hate them all. That might turn them off.

* Never forget the most important thing about blogging: money.

That’s all the tips you other bloggers get now. Anything more you have to pay me. Capisce?

This satire was used with the permission of Frank J. from IMAO. You can read more of his work by clicking here.

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