Condoskeeza; All Attitude, No Gratitude By Liberal Larry

by John Hawkins | January 27, 2005 12:01 am

Hooray, Hoorah and Whoopdee-doo; Condoskeeza Rice is our new SECRETary of LIES, thanks to a few DINO cowards in congress. Frankly, I find it remarkable that she only got 13 nay votes, considering how obstructive and evasive she was during the entire comfirmation procedure. She failed to provide the desired answers to any of Joe Biden’s[1]. Then she refused to take the blame for the quagmire our babykilling troops are hopelessly trapped in thanks to Bush’s headlong rush to war based on lies and exaggerations[2].

As one of the key warmongers planning the illegal invasion of Iraq, why did she fail to predict Abu Ghraib, and all the other horrible mistakes that have been made? There’s simply no excuse for allowing such blunders to happen, as they’re all listed right there on the Democrat Party website[3]. She could have logged on at anytime and 750,000 innocent Iraqis would be alive today. Instead, she chose to sacrifice the truth for the sake of politics. She skipped out on her responsibilities, and now she attacks the democrats for doing their Constitutional duty to bloviate loudly and shower her with soundbite-sized insults.

DOESN’T SHE KNOW HOW MUCH SENATOR BOXER HAS DONE FOR HER PEOPLE? Like loving parents, democrats have always fought to provide the black community with the tools they need to survive in a white dominated world. Yet instead of gratitude, she gives them attitude. I understand that she’s a mind-numbed lapdog for the Shrub, but she had no call talking to Senator Boxer the way she did. And although he wasn’t in the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, she never shows one ounce of respect for the esteemed Senator Robert Byrd, either. A staunch defender of minority rights with a 30 year record of accepting blacks as human beings, Byrd has recently eased his opinion of race mongrels and jews as well. Glaring at him whenever he greets her as “little missy” is unprofessional and shows a complete lack of respect for the only folks keeping Republicans from throwing her people back into bondage.

Personally, I don’t think she’s very bright. You can tell by the way she gave Richard Clarke that vacant stare when he came running down the hall screaming ‘Al QAEDA IS GOING TO FLY PLANES INTO THE WORLD TRADE CENTER ON SEPTEMBER 11TH!!!!” that she isn’t the sharpest knife in the drawer, even with the college education democrats provided her. She’s certainly not the sort of person I’d want as Secretary of State.

But I’m sure she learned a valuable lesson today. She can call herself an indepedent woman and self-made success all she wants, but everything she is and everything she will ever be comes only through the good graces of the democrat party. Perhaps in the future, Bush’s token minority appointments will show a little less sass and more fawning gratitude for those who made them who they are.

If you enjoyed this satire by Liberal Larry from BlameBush, you can read more of his work by clicking here[4].

Endnotes:
  1. Joe Biden’s: http://biden.senate.gov/pressapp/record.cfm?id=230982
  2. lies and exaggerations: http://www.cnn.com/ALLPOLITICS/stories/1998/12/16/transcripts/clinton.html
  3. Democrat Party website: http://www.democrats.org/news/200408210019.html
  4. here: http://blamebush.typepad.com/

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