Fark On Britain’s Bizarre Pro-Burglar Laws

by John Hawkins | December 9, 2004 9:33 pm

As most of you who regularly read RWN know, Britain has an insane, pro-criminal, justice system that favors burglars over homeowners[1].

Well, Dr Ian Stephen[2] has written an advice column for Brits who’re being confronted by burglars and it’s every bit as depressing as you’d expect. Here’s a little sample…

“When individuals are confronted by intruders there are some actions they should follow. Direct contact should be avoided whenever possible. If unavoidable, the victim should adopt a state of active passivity. In most cases the best form of defence is always avoidance. If this isn’t possible, act passively, be careful what you say or do and give up valuables without a struggle. This allows the victim to take charge of the situation, without the intruder’s awareness, through subtle and non-confrontational means. People can cooperate but initiate nothing. By doing nothing there is no chance of inadvertently initiating violence by saying something such as “Please don’t hurt me”.

Yes, what a magnificent criminal justice system the Brits have. If some twitchy-eyed, crack-addled, rapist/burglar breaks into your home, you’re not allowed to defend yourself out of fear you might be sent to jail. Instead you should cower in fear, in your home, afraid that you might “inadvertently initiat(e) violence by saying something such as ‘Please don’t hurt me'”.

Believe it or not, even most of the folks in the comments section at Fark[3], who usually tend to lean way to the left, find this to be asinine (maybe this is why Democrats try to avoid talking about gun control these days?)

Here’s what some of the Farkers had to say about the good doctor’s advice and the Brit’s nutty pro-criminal laws…

“Don’t let the home invaders fall and hurt themselves either. Put up night lights so they don’t stub their toes and sue.” — Solzhenisin

“I don’t get it, you are supposed to coddle someone who has broken into your home? Wouldn’t it be better to shoot them dead, or possibily hit them in the head with a bat over and over again?” — boom

“I’m a liberal with a shotgun. My taxes can pay for the burglar’s funeral.” — altinos

“Why not nip it in the bud and just put all your belongings out on the street so they don’t have to ‘invade’ to begin with?

Remember, it takes a village…” — RockIsDead

“Whatever you do, if you shoot someone in your house, keep shooting him until he is dead. If you don’t, he will say that he was confused, thought he was entering his freinds house, and that he asked you for a glass of water is all. If you kill him, then you can say that he threatend to kill you.” — BiffDangler

“That’s retarded. What are you supposed to do, make coffee for them? What the hell is keeping EVERYONE from robbing houses if there’s no fear of retribution?” — annoyed_grunt

“Whitewabbit (from Britain): im happy knowing that an intruder in my house is armed with at worst, a knife

Unless he somehow overcame his fear of doing something illegal and obtained a gun through non-traditional means.” — Ant

“You people are making Rosie O’Donnell mad” — Triaxis

“…If you consider your life to be worth more than my stuff, I have a recommendation for you. Dont break into my freakin home.

I say let the potential burglar choose which they consider the most valuable. I will agree with them. Just understand that the moment you step into my home, you have made your choice.” — Tjos Weel

“If I lived in Britain and had to deal with armed burglars, I’d follow the hunter’s protocol: shoot, shovel, and shut up….” — MasterThief

“Step 1: Buy a gun, become a burglar.
Step 2: Move to Britain, burgle until injured while burgling and then proceed to burgle the burglee with lawsuits.
Step 3: Profit.” — CokedUpWerewolf