Federal Judge Rules Virginians ‘Stupid as Texans’

Federal Judge Rules Virginians ‘Stupid As Texans’ By Scott Ott: A federal judge yesterday ruled that citizens of Virginia are “as stupid as Texans” when he blocked enforcement of a law against infanticide which had been passed by the elected representatives of the people of the Commonwealth of Virginia.

Judge Richard Williams, a Carter appointee, brushed aside the Commonwealth’s arguments and immediately ordered suspension of the law banning partial-birth abortions, pending a trial in November on whether the law is constitutional.

“I’m using the Supreme Court precedent established in Lawrence v. Texas last week,” said the Judge Williams. “The Court said that the people of Texas are too stupid to rule themselves and, by extension, implied that those in other states also lack the mental ability to make laws through their elected representatives. The people of Virginia are likewise a dull-witted lot. “

The Judge went on to note, “It’s a good thing I caught this law before it went into effect, otherwise countless babies would have been denied the right to an involuntary death at the hands of a competent surgeon.”

If you enjoyed this satire by Scott Ott, you can read more of his work at Scrappleface.

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