Glinda The Good Witch Could Have Made A Mint On eBay Part 2

Back in June of last year, I ran across someone called enchanted_whispering who was selling spells on eBay. Here are the “services” (Can casting imaginary spells for people who actually believe in witchcraft be considered a service?) she was offering,

“WEALTH/MONEY
ATTRACT THE ONE YOU LOVE
BRING BACK (ENCOURAGE) A LOVERS RETURN
WIN A JOB
INCREASE YOUR PETS SAFETY
LOST PET
INCREASE HEALTH AND VITALITY
PROTECTION
LOWER DEPRESSION
DISTANCE YOURSELF FROM UNWANTED LOVERS
ENHANCE LOVE AROUND YOU
GOOD LUCK
DEEPER INSIGHT
MORE CONFIDENCE
AVOID BREAK UP/DIVORCE
INCREASE HAPPINESS AND CONTENTMENT”

The really fascinating part was not that she was selling these spells, it’s that people were buying them and giving her positive ratings for them! However, if you buy an imaginary service from someone who you believe can effect your life for good or ill with her imaginary powers, I guess it must be a little intimidating to give that person a negative rating on eBay. I mean geeze, if you say her spell didn’t work, she might turn you into a frog or something.

Speaking of people who may be about to be turned into frogs ;), enchanted_whispering sent me an email last week bitterly complaining about my mockery of her witchcraft. Here it is,

To John Hawkins, who wrote ‘Glinda The Good Witch Could Have Made A Mint On eBay’

I have only just noticed that you have written an article on me enchanted_whispering some time last year. Why did you not have the decency to come to me directly with your thoughts rather than print things about me? You have not even giving a true account of the spells I cast as you mention some that have negative undertones which i do not deal with ever.

I am well aware that things such as spell casting is off the main track of what a lot of people would think to use but it is to me just like a herbal remedy/alternative therapy etc. I have no idea why you singled out my adverts when there are hundreds on eBay offering spells but you pre-judge me without knowing me. I have successfully stopped many suicides since I have been working on eBay, words can not express how that has felt. I help people, genuinely help people whether they actually purchase something or not. There is not time limited on my help for anyone who comes to me, some people contact me every day for help and advice and I always answer and do what I can for them.

You imply I had no negatives at 156 feedback because people may well fear some backlash from me. That is probably the worst comment you made because that is total rubbish. I am now nearing 1000 feed backs John and my feedback is still unblemished, why is it like that? Its not because I am feared far from it. I put my heart and soul into every situation that comes to me because I really want to help people. The costs of my spells are very reasonable and often barely cover the ingredients and time involved in the castings I do.

You were entitled to your opinion it just happens to be wrong. I am in total agreement there are people that abuse things of this nature, I see other people on eBay literally copying my adverts word for word sometimes and I know if they are having to do that they clearly can’t be genuine, but whether you agree with the work I do or not the fact remains I am genuine and I truly make a difference to peoples lives in a very positive way. The idea of spells is to enhance lives not give false hopes like turning to Bill Gates or dating famous people that is not what I do. What I do is help people and make a positive difference in peoples lives. What you described as wacky in your one sided views last year is what my clients would call a lifeline and a godsend. I am not asking you or anyone to agree with what I do, if its not for you that is fine, but don’t go behind my back writing things about me when you don’t even know me, that’s just not right.

Sharon (enchanted_whispering)

Yes, she’s selling SPELLS to gullible people on eBay and I’m the one who’s “just not right” for pointing out how ridiculous it is. Also, if you read her bio on eBay, she has a collection of haunted items and celebrity clients,

“I come from generations of white witches and mystics which date back to the late 1760’s. I am of Irish descent and most of my family lived or still do live in Co.Cork, Ireland. My family roots in the Emerald Isles are centuries old and go deep into my irish homeland. I have been practising various forms of witchcraft for over 30 years, with paranormal experiences from very early childhood, starting with premonitions and apparitions that would manifest around me. I grew up as a celtic pagan, with the lore and all of the magic and mystery that Ireland holds.

…Over recent years, I have acquired a number of haunted items. Mainly items of jewellery from my coven, that have been infused with powerful spells of great potency. Also from time to time, I am passed items from people put in touch with me who can no longer handle the power of their items. A selection of these items I will be selling on eBay to people I feel are destined to own these and their power.

…I have an ever increasing amount of celebrity clients from UK and USA, but my prices and commitment to helping is the same whomever I deal with.”

You know, I think if you’re seeing apparitions manifesting around you, that’s a sign that you need Prozac, not that you’re a witch. And haunted items? Does that mean she’s selling ominous looking toasters and menacing cardigan sweaters, too? Then there’s the celebrity thing. Can’t you just see Al Gore paying her to cast a spell to save the polar bears from drowning in Antarctica? Somehow, that would be incredibly appropriate.

PS #1: Would someone pay her to put Lindsey Graham to sleep until a prince kisses him? That would at least be one less vote for the amnesty bill in the Senate.

PS #2: If I disappear soon after this post comes out and you don’t find anything but a frog sitting in my desk chair, then BURN THE WITCH! Just kidding, just kidding — that was just too good of a line not to throw in there.

Share this!

Enjoy reading? Share it with your friends!

Send this to a friend