It Was A Snickers Commercial, Not A Hate Crime

by John Hawkins | February 7, 2007 2:44 pm

Over the last few days, a lot of liberals have been complaining incessantly about the Snickers commercial from the Super Bowl. You know, two guys start chewing on different ends of a Snickers bar, accidentally kiss, and then start ripping off chest hair in an effort to do something manly.

I mean you would think Snickers was going to start rounding up gay people and forcing them to pick peanuts in heterosexuality reeducation camps from the way the left side of the blogosphere has been howling.

Not only did they get freaked out about the commercial, they got freaked out because there’s an alternate ending where the two guys in the commercial slam a car hood on each other and hit each other with a wrench and perhaps, worse yet, there are actual football players showing how grossed out they are by guys accidentally kissing.

John Aravosis from AMERICAblog[1] was as weirded out about the whole thing as a stoner who took 5 hits of acid right before he was thrust into the middle of a live action remake of “Eight Legged Freaks!”

Here’s what he had to say after some players looked disgusted after they saw the two guys accidentally kiss in the commercial:

“Because the reactions of the Bears and Colts players to two guys kissing is outright disgust – you can watch the reactions by clicking under the “extras” button at the bottom of the site. “That ain’t right,” one player says. A second player crinkles his face into absolute disgust as the guy’s kiss. The interviews with the players reacting to the gay kiss continue on and on. These are role models for kids, and they’re telling America’s kids, and rather scary adults, that two guys kissing “ain’t right.”

Newsflash Aravosis: The reaction of the average heterosexual male to “two guys kissing is outright disgust.” To heterosexuals, it is gross, it’s nasty, and it “ain’t right.” Now, since Aravosis is gay, he surely doesn’t look at it that way, but that’s what tolerance is all about, isn’t it? We go out, we all do our own thing and live our own lives, and at the end of the day, even if we disagree or don’t approve of each other’s lifestyle, that’s OK. The problem with people like Aravosis is that “tolerance” only goes one way with them. They expect the rest of society to slavishly cater to their whims on every issue related to sexual preference or be labeled as a homophobe and an anti-gay bigot, but they never show any of the tolerance they demand towards people who don’t agree with them.

Next, Aravosis goes on to an alternate Snickers ad called, “Wrench.”

In this ad, one of the two guys who accidentally kiss hits the other with a wrench and the other slams a car hood on his friend after their exhortations to do something manly. Here’s the Aravosis overreaction to that:

d 4: “Wrench” (these are the actual names Snickers gave the ads). The two guys accidentally kiss, they say to each other again “quick, do something manly,” and one guy proceeds to pick up a huge oversized wrench and violently attack the other guy, while the second takes the first and throws him under the hood of the car, slamming it down on his head. Yes, the appropriate reaction to a guy kissing you is to beat the crap out of the guy who kissed you. Maybe Snickers should rename this ad “Matthew Shepard.”

Both of these characters are supposed to be heterosexual friends voluntarily hurting each other to feel more manly. So how incredibly oversensitive do you have to be to compare it to the Matthew Shepard murder?

The Snickers commercial was nothing but a dumb, poorly constructed ad (How exactly does two guys accidentally kissing as a result of eating Snickers encourage the average person to buy more Snickers bars), not a hate crime. So all you people complaining, including Aravosis, should stop being so touchy and get a sense of humor.

Endnotes:
  1. AMERICAblog: http://americablog.blogspot.com/2007/02/snickers-superbowl-web-site-promotes.html

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