And right in the nick of time:

NEW YORK CITY, NY – In deep financial trouble , the New York Times has ceased printing news stories and, instead, begun selling a variety of home-baked pies. “Some of our staff have experience making such things,” said Times spokesperson Julian Van Dyke. “As a result, we’ve laid off everyone but those who can bake and the ad reps.” So far, the Times has baked blueberry, cherry, and yam pies . . . .

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