Matt Drudge’s Personal Diary Part 3 — Satire By The Chortler

March 15, 2005

GOSSIP REPORTER AWAITS MOMENT OF
TRUTH: SHE LOVES ME … SHE LOVES ME NOT…

March 14, 2005



ONLINE GOSSIP COLUMNIST WAKES UP!!!
SMELLS COFFEE!!!

March 10, 2005



MILK GOES SOUR!!! REPORTER FORGETS
TO PUT IT IN FRIDGE!!!

March 5, 2005



GHOSTS!!! SPOOKS!!! OTHER CREEPY
THINGS!!! ONLINE REPORTER HAS
NIGHTMARE!!!

March 1, 2005



S**T!!! IDIOT REPORTER LEAVES
F**KING KEYS IN
CAR!!!

February 25, 2005



GOSSIP DRESSES UP!!! NOWHERE TO
GO!!!

February 10, 2005



YUK!!! ONLINE REPORTER MEETS
DOUGHNUT HE DOESN’T
LIKE!!!

Febrary 2, 2005



OUTRAGEOUS SMELL TAKES OVER
APARTMENT!!! MUST REMEMBER TO TAKE OUT
TRASH!!!

January 27, 2005



BRING IT: NEIGHBOR AND ONLINE
GOSSIP COLUMNIST CONTINUE RAGING BATTLE OVER PARKING
SPACE!

January 24, 2005



MESSAGE FROM ABOVE? BIRD DOES
BUSINESS ON ONLINE REPORTERS
HAT!!!

January 17, 2005



REPORTER CAN”T SEE!!! WHERE DID I
LEAVE MY GLASSES?!?

January 10, 2005



BOREDOM!!! ENNUI!!! NOTHING ON TV
TONIGHT!!!

January 6, 2005



LOUD NOISES, SCREAMING HEARD AS
ONLINE GOSSIP REPORTER ENTERS DENTIST’S
OFFICE

January 5, 2005



HUMONGOUS STAIN RAMPAGES SHIRT!!!
TIME TO DO
LAUNDRY!!!

January 4, 2005



FLASH: LIBRARY BOOKS THREE WEEKS
OVERDUE! SERIOUS CONSEQUENCES
EXPECTED!

The satire was used with the permission of The Chortler.