Parody This Book By Bryan Preston

by John Hawkins | January 9, 2006 6:06 pm

Here’s one book[1] that will never show up my kid’s bookshelf:

Meet the latest children’s author, Sen. Ted Kennedy, and his Portuguese Water Dog, Splash, his co-protagonist in “My Senator and Me: A Dogs-Eye View of Washington, D.C.”

Scholastic Inc. will release the book in May.

“I am very excited about the opportunity to create a book for young readers and their families that will deepen their understanding of how our American government works,” Kennedy said in a statement Monday issued by Scholastic.

According to Scholastic, Kennedy’s book “not only takes readers through a full day in the Senator’s life, but also explains how a bill becomes a law.” Kennedy, a Massachusetts Democrat, was inspired to write the book from his work with a Washington-based reading program, “Everybody Wins!”

Everbody wins…except Mary Jo!

Everybody wins…except the American taxpayer!

Everybody wins…especially America’s enemies!

And the “full day in the Senator’s life” seems like something more suited to a crime novel than a kids’ book.

A full day in the Senator’s life…gory details of that six-martini lunch with Ralph Neas and Kate Michelman while they plot to destroy another Bush court nominee for no reason!

A full day in the Senator’s life…how he avoids the latest paternity suit! Watch Sen. Kennedy not see windmills block his view! Watch Sen. Kennedy relive the Goldwater presidency[2]! Watch ironically named superdog Splash not save the drowning secretary!

I could go on like this all day.

This content was used with the permission of JunkYardBlog[3].

Endnotes:
  1. one book: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060109/ap_en_ot/books_ted_kennedy
  2. Goldwater presidency: http://www.theneweditor.com/index.php?/archives/1797-Sharp-...-Sharp-Like-a-Bowlin-Ball,-That-Is.html
  3. JunkYardBlog: http://junkyardblog.transfinitum.net/

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