Ridge: Election Not Postponed, CIA Misread Threat By Scott Ott

U.S. Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge today announced that the November presidential election will go on as scheduled despite his recent warning of terrorist threats to disrupt it, and news that a postponement plan may be in the works.

“Central Intelligence misread the threat,” said Mr. Ridge. “They started with the presumption that terrorists want to terrorize us, and then they intercepted chatter which sounded like a threat to our constitutional Republic from the enemies of freedom.”

As it turns out, the intercepted communications came from the headquarters of the Democrat National Committee, during a discussion about the upcoming convention in Boston.”

Mr. Ridge said his department would postpone the election only under extreme circumstances.

“We would consider such extraordinary measures only if, for example, we learned of plans to run a NASCAR race on election day,” he said. “That would constitute a clear and present danger to our electoral process.”

If you enjoyed this satire by Scott Ott, you can read more of his work at Scrappleface.

Permalinks


Share this!

Enjoy reading? Share it with your friends!

Send this to a friend