The 40 Most Obnoxious Quotes Of 2006
40) “I just the other day got, an internet was sent by my staff at 10 o’clock in the morning on Friday and I just got it yesterday. Why? Because it got tangled up with all these things going on the internet commercially…They want to deliver vast amounts of information over the internet. And again, the internet is not something you just dump something on. It’s not a truck. It’s a series of tubes. And if you don’t understand those tubes can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and its going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material.” — Senator Ted Stevens explains how the internet works.
39) “I wouldn’t want to be a Senator or Congressman. I’m able to influence politics much more effectively doing what I do. Now I can shape the national political debate. The only way I could exert more influence would be if I were president. But I’d never want that guy’s job. Never.” — Blogger Markos Moulitsas Zúniga has delusions of grandeur.
38) “You know what? At some point, (Bush or Bin Laden) has to put it back in his pants and zip up the zipper.” — Star Jones on The View
37) “Does she bite your balls like this when you go home?” — Chris Matthews to John Edwards, after his wife makes a comment that Matthews apparently doesn’t like.
36) “This fellow here over here with the yellow shirt, Macaca, or whatever his name is. He’s with my opponent. He’s following us around everywhere. And it’s just great. We’re going to places all over Virginia, and he’s having it on film and its great to have you here and you show it to your opponent because he’s never been there and probably will never come. …Let’s give a welcome to Macaca, here. Welcome to America and the real world of Virginia.” — George Allen
35) “In Delaware, the largest growth of population is Indian-Americans, moving from India. You cannot go to a 7/11 or a Dunkin’ Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent. I’m not joking.” — Joe Biden
34) “I think our motto should be, post-9/11, ‘Raghead talks tough, raghead faces consequences.” — Ann Coulter
33) “We can go to Okinawa. We, we don’t have—we can redeploy (to Iraq) almost instantly. So that’s not—that’s, that’s a fallacy. That, that’s just a statement to rial up people to support a failed policy wrapped in illusion….when I say Okinawa, I, I’m saying troops in Okinawa. When I say a timely response, you know, our fighters can fly from Okinawa very quickly. And—and—when they don’t know we’re coming. There’s no question about it. And, and where those airplanes won’t—came from I can’t tell you, but, but I’ll tell you one thing, it doesn’t take very long for them to get in with cruise missiles or with, with fighter aircraft or, or attack aircraft, it doesn’t take any time at all.” — John Murtha explains his brilliant idea: that we can put an American rapid reaction force in Okinawa, to respond quickly to threats in Iraq, over 5000 miles away
32) “It’s time for us to rebuild New Orleans, the one that should be a chocolate New Orleans, and I don’t care what people are saying uptown wherever they are, this city will be chocolate at the end of the day. This city will be a majority African-American city — it’s the way God wants it to be.” — New Orleans Mayor, Ray Nagin
31) “…I would further strongly urge Democrats who don’t believe marriage is between a man and a woman but who feel they ought to pretend to believe this in order to win elections (a plausible position) need to do a better job of pretending. I’ve heard a shockingly large number of politicians say things, in rooms where journalists are present, that make it perfectly clear that they think gay marriage is just fine but that the voters aren’t ready for it. That’s a sensible thing to believe, but you can’t go around saying it if you’re trying to win votes. If you’re going to lie, then lie — and lie convincingly!” — Prominent liberal blogger Matthew Yglesias
30) “The simple image of the cross on stage as the Gospel injunction to help the poor and feed the hungry was displayed in words above it was one of the most effective fusions of Christian evangelism and pop-culture I have ever seen. And yet she is banned in Tennessee. As a reader once put it to me, these fundamentalists may believe in Jesus, but many sure don’t believe Jesus. Madonna is closer to Jesus’ authentic teachings in this respect than many Christianists.” — Andrew Sullivan
29) “Mississippi gets more than their fair share back in federal money, but who the hell wants to live in Mississippi?” — Charles Rangel
28) “It seems to me like 19 amateurs with box cutters taking over four commercial airliners and hitting 75% of their targets, that feels like a conspiracy theory. It raises a lot of questions.” — Charlie Sheen
27) “President Bush is pursuing a globalist agenda to create a North American Union, effectively erasing our borders with both Mexico and Canada. This was the hidden agenda behind the Bush administration’s true open borders policy….Why doesn’t President Bush just tell the truth? His secret agenda is to dissolve the United States of America into the North American Union.” — Jerome Corsi
26) “I’d never realized how much of a death cult Christianity is. When we weren’t fixating on how awesome Christ’s murder was, we were singing about how terrific it was going to be when we bite it. Chipper up, Christians! There’s a lot to live for. They’re making more of those ‘Narnia’ movies.” — Joel Stein
25) “Radical Christianity is just as threatening as radical Islam in a country like America.” — Rosie O’Donnell
24) “When I asked Gore Vidal at dinner why the White House seemed so serene and at ease about the vote, he replied that, this time around, the Bush-Cheney henchmen could simply call on martial law. He glumly noted that we are so far down the road toward totalitarianism that, even if Democrats do win back the Congress, it would take at least two generations before the last six years of damage to the nation could be reversed.” — Lyn Davis Lear at The Huffington Post
23) “I don’t take sides for or against Hezbollah or for or against Israel.” — Representative John Dingell
22) “We are living in terrorism as black people in America. And it has been that way since the dawning of slavery….If we are having problems with finding our own inner souls and dignity to live out a life that is honorable, what is it that has put us in this position? We didn’t volunteer for it. And those who have put us here and chosen to keep us here are people who deal in terror.” — Harry Belafonte
21) “(George Bush) is ten times the terrorist that Osama ever was.” — Cindy Sheehan
20) “It’s quite reasonable to conclude that Bush will harm the nation more–if not more than Bin Laden would like to, than more than he actually can.” — Johnathan Chait
19) “I think the news of the loss of any human being is a tragedy. I think al-Zarqawi’s death is a double tragedy. His death will incite a new wave of revenge.” — Michael Berg
18) “Capital punishment? I think that if, if I’ve got to find that guy in Spain who indicted Pinochet and get him for war crimes, and I get him to do the same thing for Bush. And in that case, I would be for capital punishment. Otherwise, I am against it.” — New York gubernatorial Green Party candidate Malachy McCourt on The Chris Matthews show
17) “If a young fella has an option of having a decent career or joining the army to fight in Iraq, you can bet your life that he would not be in Iraq.” — Charles Rangel
16) “The entire country may disagree with me, but I don’t understand the necessity for patriotism. Why do you have to be a patriot? About what? This land is our land? Why? You can like where you live and like your life, but as for loving the whole country… I don’t see why people care about patriotism.” — Natalie Maines
15) “You know, education, if you make the most of it, if you study hard and you do your homework, and you make an effort to be smart, uh, you, you can do well. If you don’t, you get stuck in Iraq.” — John Kerry, in what he later claimed was a botched joke.
14) “I just want to say that George W. Bush is the syphilis president. The only difference between Bush and Hitler is that Hitler was elected.” — Kurt Vonnegut
13) “I’m gonna eat the placenta. I thought that would be good. Very nutritious. I’m gonna eat the cord and the placenta right there.” — Tom Cruise to GQ magazine in what may or may not have been a joke.
12) “Which leads me to ask: is Karl Rove planning a terrorist attack during the Super Bowl, in order to set the stage for building towards war with Iran over the coming year?” — Bob Fertik from Democrats.com
11) “You can talk, you can talk, you’re brave now motherf**ker. Throw his *ss out. He’s a n*gger! He’s a n*gger! He’s a n*gger! A n*gger, look, there’s a n*gger! They’re going to arrest me for calling a black man a n*gger.” — Michael Richards
10) “If I got (Condi Rice) a— on camera, I would put my Mars Air Jordans so far up her butt that the Mayo Clinic would have to remove them.” — Spike Lee
9) “Again, (America is) a stupid country with stupid people who don’t pay attention.” — Bill Maher
8) “Is there such a thing as a man made stroke? In other words, did someone do this to him?” — Joy Behar, on The View, wonders if Republicans gave Senator Tim Johnson a stroke.
7) “Quit supporting my country and supporting crimes against humanity.” — Cindy Sheehan in Australia
6) “In Vietnam, our soldiers came back and they were reviled as baby killers, in shame and humiliation. It isn’t happening now, but I will tell you – there has never been an [American] army as violent and murderous as our army has been in Iraq.” — Seymour Hersh
5) “F*****g Jews… The Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world. Are you a Jew?” — Mel Gibson in a drunken tirade, after he’d been pulled over by the police
4) “Why not go kill a Muslim? Don’t leave it up to the soldiers, don’t leave it up to the middle east. You’ve got Muslims in New Jersey. Why not go kill some?” — Mike Malloy
3) “Check out this startling excerpt from George Monbiot’s new book Heat. It’s about the climate-change “denial industry,” which most of you are probably familiar with. What you may not know about is the peculiar role of the tobacco industry in the whole mess. I’ve read about this stuff for years and even I was surprised by some of the details. When we’ve finally gotten serious about global warming, when the impacts are really hitting us and we’re in a full worldwide scramble to minimize the damage, we should have war crimes trials for these b*stards — some sort of climate Nuremberg.” — David Roberts, Grist Magazine
2) “What if another terror attack just before this fall’s elections could save many thousand-times the lives lost? I start from the premise that there is already a substantial portion of the electorate that tends to vote GOP because they feel that Bush has “kept us safe,” and that the Republicans do a better job combating terrorism. If an attack occurred just before the elections, I have to think that at least a few of the voters who persist in this “Bush has kept us safe” thinking would realize the fallacy they have been under. If 5% of the “he’s kept us safe” revise their thinking enough to vote Democrat, well, then, the Dems could recapture the House and the Senate…” — Russell Shaw at the Huffington Post
1) “Karl (Rove) is a shameless b*stard. This could explain why his mother killed herself. Once she discovered what a despicable soul she had spawned she apparently saw no other way out.” — Ex-CIA agent Larry Johnson