The Humane Thing to Do Is Let Africa Starve — Satire By Frank J.

by John Hawkins | March 24, 2005 4:25 am

Africa has been a troubled region for some time. Unstable politics, genocide, aids outbreaks, mass starvation – we do what we can to help, we send money to Sally Struthers, but do we really think Africa is going to get better and be a fully functional continent again? Sure, we can keep things patched together, but each day Africa exists is just another day of suffering. It’s time we face up to reality and give Africa the peace it needs in a natural end.

It’s time we starve everyone in Africa to death.

“Yes, before someone brings it up, America does have a 10 trillion dollar life insurance policy on Africa.” The U.N. will certainly be on board with this as dealing with Africa has been too much for them as well. We’ll have to watch all entry points where people may misguidedly try to bring food to the Africans; as leaders of the world, this is our choice to make and others shouldn’t subvert it. Plus, this is what Africa wants as I think I remember some ancient tribal leaders saying they wanted their people starved to death if the continent ended up like it is today.

And yes, before someone brings it up, America does have a 10 trillion dollar life insurance policy on Africa that can be cashed if everyone there dies, but this isn’t about America – this is about Africa and what’s best for it. And you’d have to be a pretty heartless person to not see how death by starvation is what the people of Africa would really want. Yes, I can’t know that I can’t know for sure since they speak languages I don’t understand, but can’t you see they’re tired of barely making it by on foreign aid and showing their children in television ads? They want a natural end.

It’s a hard choice to make, but it is ours. Some may complain about us choosing wrong, but the important thing is we know we’re right while we let millions die.

Frank J. is a syndicated columnist whose columns appear worldwide on IMAO.us and is the author of such books as “I Was Following My Hamster’s Wishes When I Put Him in the Microwave” and “Violent Offenders Deserve a Natural Death”.

This satire was used with the permission of Frank J. from IMAO. You can read more of his work by clicking here[1].

Endnotes:
  1. here: http://www.imao.us/

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