The Top 10 Hottest Contestants In The Upcoming Miss Universe Pageant, In Order

10) Ms. Australia
10) Ms. South Africa
8) Ms. Nicaragua
7) Ms. Denmark
6) Ms. Ukraine
5) Ms. Angola
4) Ms. Estonia
3) Ms. Brazil
2) Ms. Italy
1) Ms. Mexico

PS: A lot of these contestants were, for reasons that completely escape me, deliberately being made up to look skanky, especially in their initial pics. You have to suspect that a lot of these women probably looked better coming to get their pics done than they did after they gussied them up to do their photo shoots.

PS #2: There were an unusual number of women in this year’s Ms. Universe that were probably only 5s and 6s on a 10 scale. Ms. Tanzania for example, was BALD, which should be an immediate disqualifier for being in any sort of beauty contest.

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