The True/False Liberalism Quiz By John Hawkins & Doc Jerry Komar

by John Hawkins | December 23, 2003 1:31 am

Have you ever wondered if you’re really a liberal? Well, wonder no more! Just take this nifty little true/false quiz and all will be revealed!

1. Bush was selected, not elected…like Hitler!

2. Criminals are victims too…well unless, they steal my old Joan Baez tracks. Do you know hard it was to get those? I’d like to kill that guy!

3. Loving America means talking about what’s wrong with it incessantly and downplaying all the good things it does.

4. Howard Dean would be another great president…like Jimmy Carter!

5. Jesse Jackson is the greatest living African-American other than the first black President, Bill Clinton.

6. The French are our real allies because they love us enough to undercut our policies at every turn so we won’t make any mistakes.

7. Mumia Abu-Jamal is innocent, George W. Bush is guilty!

8. I support immigration laws as long as they’re not enforced!

9. Discrimination against minorities is no longer acceptable in America…unless they happen to be conservative judges waiting for confirmation from the Senate.

10. Using military force to liberate Iraq & set up a Democracy in Iraq is not justifiable on humanitarian grounds because the UN didn’t approve. On the other hand, using military force to liberate Kosovo was justifiable on humanitarian grounds even though the UN didn’t approve.

11. Conservatives want to pollute the environment because they love drinking dirty water and breathing filthy air.

12. Bush knew about 9/11 before it happened….yes, I’m serious! It’s true, it really is…I saw it on an internet site right beside of a story about lizard people who rule the earth.

13. We should give the UN Security Council a veto over whether we use our military or not because China, France, & Russia are looking out for our best interests!

14. Jim Crow laws were a bad thing because they discriminated against people based on race and Affirmative Action is a good thing because it discriminates against people based on race.

The correct answer to all the questions is false! If you answered true…

1-5 times: Watch Fox, read National Review, & turn off NPR. It’s not too late for you!
6-10 times: You’re so far to the left that you’re practically French.
11-14 times: Michael Moore, what are you doing here?

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