Top Ten Pieces Of Advice From W To Hillary — Satire By Harvey

by John Hawkins | September 27, 2007 8:42 am

Rumor has it that President Bush has been quietly giving advice to Hillary about not making stupid promises regarding Iraq that she’ll regret if she gets elected. I’m sure the advice also encompasses other topics, and I’ll speculate thusly about what he might have said:

10) “Choose a running mate that’s in favor of gun control so as not to be blindsided by an embarrassing ‘lawyer hunting accident'”.

9) “Don’t fire your US Attorneys, just kill them and dump the bodies in a park somewhere… like I have to tell YOU to do that!”

8) “Keep Bill the hell away from my daughters!”

7) “Don’t walk barefoot on the White House lawn – John Kerry’s medals are still out there somewhere and those things are POINTY!”

6) “If you win, I’m TOTALLY stealing all the H’s off the computer keyboards before I go.”

5) “That new French President Sarkozy is a terror with his SBD’s. Try to meet with him outdoors whenever possible.”

4) “Ya want fluffy omelets, ya gotta beat ’em until your arm is sore. Good advice for raising kids, too.”

3) “Yankees take the Series in 6. Lay the lumber. Don’t ask questions, just trust me.”

2) “Please, for the love of God, no more cleavage.”

And the #1 piece of advice from W to Hillary…

1) “After using the ‘Little Oval Office’, jiggle the handle.”

This satire was used with the permission of IMAO[1].

Endnotes:
  1. IMAO: http://www.imao.us/

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