Doctrine Of Constrainment
That’s what they calls it after the ‘rents freak the freak out about next month’s Visa statement showcasing over a hundred bucks splurged on liq liq liquor (liquor) on a Tuesday night (to be fair – please note a Jalapeno burger de luxe should be in there somewhere): – with the appropriate gratuity – natch.
Self imposed restraint in the realm of the diplopolititary is not unlike a boring assetted redux of “Taming American Power” – the risible and not well tho’t out tome courtesy of Weenie Hut Juniors guy – the Great and Little Satan Hating faux academic und self ‘scribed High Priest of the amoral ancient sad corrupt Cult of Stability.
1.) Great Satan and her hedonistic hyperpuissant hegemonic hotness makes uncool despotries that love terrorists, fiddle about with WMD, torment their own ppl and their neighbors nervous.
2.) Haughty hypocrisy (carebeful! Direct hit on realpolitik – nicht wahr?) – sucking up to tyrants in hope for stability while talkin’ bout those Universal Values or preaching stuff about new clear proliferators and then according treaties and internat’l respect to oath breakers
3.) How Great Satan displays her hyperpuissance and acts out whenever the need or even opportunity arises.
Two junior grade Vulcans point out the academic ‘Binding Great Satan Posse” has been hot to fashion a just another ho among hoes strategic plot -a: “doctrine of self-containment.” Or, perhaps more better fitting, the “Doctrine of Constrainment.”
This bassackwards mindset – as best understood – emerges from the post 911 (and last millennium’s “Blame Great Satan 1st” School of tho’tless tho’t): conviction that Great Satan cannot and should not exercise her magically delicious mad skills of boldness and independence characteristic of her FoPo in the decades after World War II.
“…That view runs roughly as follows: traditional ideas of American leadership serving American interests abroad are not a proper guide for future conduct. They have spawned crimes and blunders–in Iran in the early 1950s, then in Vietnam, and recently in Iraq, for example. To prevent further calamities, Great Satan should drop her obsession with her own nat’l interests and concentrate on working for the world’s general good on an equal footing with other countries, recognizing that it is multinat’l bodies that grant legitimacy on the world stage.
Two big ideas animate the Constrainment Doctrine
1) America’s role in world affairs for more than a century has been, more often than not, aggressive rather than constrained, wasteful rather than communal, and arrogant in promoting democracy, despite our own democratic shortcomings. Accordingly, Great Satan has much to apologize for, including failure to understand others, refusal to defer sufficiently to others, selfishness in pursuing her legit interests as opfor’d to global interests, and showing far too much concern for American sovereignty, independence, and freedom of action.
2) Something something multilateral institutions offer the best hope for restraining Great Satan’s power and moderating her nat’l assertiveness.
Several of the academs promoting the bizarre idea that Great Satan and Bashar’s Syria are exactly the same are hooked up to 44’s Admin:
Sam Pow (and it must be said – a lot of her stuff is prett cool) gets a totally theory happy high that prob sounds great in a climate controlled environ like a classroom yet will totally suck in the real world:
“…Great Satan’s foreign policy has to be rethought. It needs not tweaking but overhauling… Instituting a doctrine of mea culpa would enhance our credibility by showing that American decision-makers do not endorse the sins of their predecessors. When DeutschBundesKanzler Willi Brandt went down on one knee in the Warsaw ghetto, his gesture was gratifying to World War II survivors, but it was also ennobling and cathartic for Germany. Would such an approach be futile for Great Satan?
State Dept’s Chief Policy Plotress:
“…Show humility rather than just talk about it. 44 must ask Americans to acknowledge to ourselves and to the world that we have made serious, even tragic, mistakes in the aftermath of September 11–in invading Iraq, in condoning torture and flouting international law, and in denying the very existence of global warming until a hurricane destroyed one of our most beloved cities….
“…Great Satan should make clear that our hubris, as in the old Greek myths, has diminished us and led to tens of thousands of unnecessary deaths.
Sorry – zoned out for sec – look, nuance is a very fine thing, subtle perhaps – yet does any serious thinking person seriously think acting all pitiful and remorseful will inspire Aegypt to stop tormenting girls for life in their horrific Black Veil Brides complexes? Or that Syria might empower non Alliwicious citizens to partake of those Universal Values as Arab League dismantles assorted despotries – holy, secular or royal?
Yes yes and yes – Collectivist China would prob like us more better if Great Satan worked with Shang Hai Co Op to divy up our little sister democrazies like Taiwan, SoKo, Philippines and Nippon into Chinese hands.
Truly any chance for admiration, love, respect and cooperation to forsake new born and long time democrazies like Iraq, Ukrainia and Little Satan into autocratic Ottoman, Persian and Commonwealth orbits?
This is the flaw in the Constrainment approach. Simply put – Great Satan and her League of Hot! Democazies have zero interests in common with the Not Hot League of Autocrazies. Gotta play “Which one of these things is not like the other thing” (with all apologies to Strauss and Sesame Street) instead of the goofy fakebelieve meme that Great Satan must be ‘even handed’ in her dealings with the world.
Instead – Great Satan should be LOLingly proud that certain nation states fully crunk with censorship, faux elections, no elections, gendercide, intolerance, secret trials, secret prisons and secret executions are frightened beyond repair at the ever present American spectre hooked up with the World Famous M 16
“…In the seven decades following World War II, when America achieved the dominant position in world affairs, realists and idealists have agreed on a number of fundamental ideas about Great Satan’s nat’l sec:
“…American interests, rather than global interests, should predominate Great Satan’s policymaking. American leadership, as traditionally defined, is indispensible to promoting the interests of America and American allies, who are our fellow democracies.
Great Satan’s hyperpuissance is a force for good in the world. And, as important as internat’l cooperation can be, any pres should like totally cherish American sovereignty and defend her ability to act independently to protect the American ppl and their interests.
Doctrine of Constrainment rejects all these truths, binds Great Satan’s hair to the floor so tight she can’t even blink and devolves and devalues her status among nation states.
Constrainment is shocking, uncool and a weirdly unAmerican nonAmerican FoPo approach.
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A junior studying journalism, military history and political science, Courtney was named one of 2010's "20 Hottest Women in New Media." She also created the infamous diplomatic, military and intelligence analysis site Great Satan's Girlfriend. Her expertise includes interventions, COIN, strategic uses of American power, global democracy promotion, authoritarian marginalization, gender apartheid, international relations theory and terrorism.
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