Calling Pets “Pets” Is a Thought Crime


It’s time for a new edition of the Newspeak dictionary. According to the pointy-headed circus clowns who pass down surrealist moral judgments from atop their ivory towers, our current vocabulary oppresses animals:

Animal lovers should stop calling their furry or feathered friends “pets” because the term is insulting, leading academics claim.

Domestic dogs, cats, hamsters or budgerigars should be rebranded as “companion animals” while owners should be known as “human carers”, they insist.

Other forbidden terms include “critters” and “beasts.” Pet owners are not to be referred to as “owners,” because this “harks back to a previous age” when animals were considered to be animals.

The term “wildlife” is not to be used because “For most, ‘wildness’ is synonymous with uncivilized, unrestrained, barbarous existence.” In actuality, academics have discovered that tigers and hyenas sit around tea tables in the jungle, sipping Earl Grey with their pinkies raised.

Certain idiomatic expressions also have to go:

Phrases such as “sly as a fox, “eat like a pig” or “drunk as a skunk” are all unfair to animals, they claim.

With all this verbal abuse hurled at their sensitive feelings, you can see why Obama’s Regulatory Czar Cass Sunstein wants animals to be provided with lawyers so they can sue us.

animals-tea-party.jpg
Evidence that animals are actually civilized.

On a tip from Byron. Cross-posted at Moonbattery.

Related Articles

0

DESTROYING AMERICA: Obama Has Created Larger Deficit Than EVERY Other President Combined

A closer look at some of the numbers connected with the U.S. budget has found that in a mere six

0

Kristoff: Boy, These Liberal Cities Like Baltimore Sure Are A Mess And Dangerous For Blacks

Obviously, what is going on in Baltimore is cause for a National Conversation. Of course, what gets left out of

8

AFL-CIO Chief Pleading for Union Support of Dems in Nov.

The AFL-CIO plans to spend another $50 million coming to the aid of Democrats during this campaign season for the

comments

Share This

Share this post with your friends!