CPAC Updates: I Am Now In DC. CPAC May Officially Begin

by John Hawkins | February 6, 2008 2:29 pm

I’m sure you’ve heard that DC is the murder capitol of the United States and after driving here, I know why because I am ready to kill the people from Mapquest, the people who designed the roads here, and one service station owner.

After making great time all the way here, I got lost about 3 times in the final 11 miles of the trip as I got into DC. The most annoying part of it was when I took a wrong turn and realized I was in Chinatown, Koreatown, something like that because everybody was Asian and there were Asian stores everywhere. Although that neighborhood was probably safe, there are a lot of neighborhoods in DC that you DO NOT want to get lost in, so I figured I’d stop, ask directions so I could get back on track.

So, I walk in, talk to the guy and it goes about like this,

Hello, I’m lost. Can you tell me how to get to Calvert street? It’s in downtown DC.


Yes, downtown DC. I was coming down 495 but I know I went too far because I ended up in Maryland.

You want to go to Maryland? I can get you to Maryland…

No, I need to get to the Omni. It’s in downtown DC on Calvert street.

You go that way and then…

(Pointing in a direction) That way?

(Ignoring the direction I was pointing in) Just go to 495 and take Washington street and that will get you to the middle of DC and maybe you can find it from there.

(Sigh) Thank you.

Incidentally, after I left, I just turned back down a different street, headed towards 495 and amazingly just ran into the road I was looking for like a mile from the station.

Fortunately, I am here now….

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