by John Hawkins | April 24, 2003 1:24 am
I Get Letters — A Few Hate Mail Samples: Just for entertainment value, here are a few samples of the hate mail that I receive. This is pretty much run of the mill stuff….
From a man of few words named Joel Lively…
John Hawkins …is an idiot.”
Here’s one from someone named Mike Bloxham asking if I’m for real or not. Yes, there are people out there who are so insulated that they can’t believe that there are people out there who disagree with them. I know that from personal experience because one of them was the editor of my school paper in college who was completely shocked that someone wrote a letter to the paper praising an anti-abortion piece that I wrote…
“when i started to read your article i assumed it was a joke but as i read on i realised you were serious.my only problem i am left with is do you believe this load of rubbish or is it just more propaganda for thick right wingers?
you are pathetic,”
Here’s another one from Clair Kruesel at IA State that’s along the same lines. Hopefully this is a phase she’s going through and she won’t end being permanently “Streisanized”…
“Hi… I read your website pretty thoroughly after being linked by a friend, and I am not sure if the content is serious or in jest. The FAQ page is convincing of the former, but I just can’t convince myself that someone would actually be proud of such political views. I hope your website is a joke (and a very good one at that) but if not, well… I suggest that you remove the “Quotes” page, because I find most of the Democratic quotes to be quite rational and convincing against the Republican views expressed by your page. I am not a Democrat or Republican, but I assume you wouldn’t want to convert any of your Republican readers to the “other side” inadvertently. I do have to say that the “Democratic translation page” is pretty accurate and amusing. Anyway – those are my ramblings.”
Here’s one from RSMK that’s sort of disjointed & kooky…
Organised by the well known cheat George Bush and Co.
? one better than Pearl Harbour
Certainly better than the “attack” on the Mexican Parliament
Killing a million innocent women and children in Iraq. Will get a big laugh on the Lenno show !
SICK SICK AMERICA.”
I also get hate mail that doesn’t really seem to jive with anything I’m saying on the page. This email from Christopher Giardina is a good example…
“It is piece’s of sh!t like you and this web site that are the enemy of America, NOT MUSLIMS! The problem with you are the lies that you put out there, you are trying to persuade the weak minded people in order to further your SICK agenda. America will be victorious in Iraq, capture u mama bin layin, and with the grace of the ALMIGHTY LORD and JESUS CHRIST bring some hope to the youth of the oil rich nations so they will stop sacrificing themselves for people like you and the oppressive regimes that hijacked the middle east.”
This one from Jordan Bernard treats a humor piece about the rain forest (I think they mean this one) like it’s a hard hitting editorial…
“Is this a website a parody of the right wing? I seriously can’t tell. Your humour is pretty dumb and mostly an obvious, poorly done rip-off of The Onion. Your war news fails to report such things as Iraqis refusing humanitarian aid when it is supplied by America, and how hundreds of civilians are being “liberated.” If thats what you call being bombed. We bombed a house where two families were taking shelter. We hit the house dead on. There were no military targets in the area, yet you still claim to be liberating Iraqis. Does John Hawkins really think what he was implying in his rain forest article? That liberals are only concerned with animals and plants? So taking that out destroying rain forests is a great idea right? No, its not. You know those big green leafy things called trees? They help make oxygen. Oxygen is neccesary for all forms of life. Including humans. So go ahead and cut down the forests and see how you feel when you cant breathe. Also, I guess it was just coincidence that the company that has received the largest reconstruction contract previously boasted Dick Cheney as C.E.O. Especially when he still has great financial interest in that company. Its amazing how things can work out.”
There are plenty of others I could have posted, but these give you a pretty good idea of the type of stuff I get. The only ones missing are from the white power freaks complaining because I make fun of them in the ACPOTI page. Of course, all the hate mail I get can’t be as creative as this email that I received during the Afghan war. Now that was an amusing piece of “hate mail” =D…
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