by John Hawkins | January 8, 2004 11:59 pm
As the U.S. slowly draws a conclusion to the Gulf War, Americans gaze in reflection at these periods of war. To help us remember these tales of victory, the White House has teamed up with George Lucas’ Industrial Light and Magic to produce Gulf War I and II on DVD.
This two DVD set is filled with over 37 hours of war-time footage. Each DVD is digitally enhanced with THX sound and includes bonus features such as:
· Easter eggs (Find WMD)
· Commentary from Winners and Losers
· Deleted Scenes
· Interactive tour of a Spider Hole
· The Best of Comical Ali
· The alternate “MOAB” ending
ILM has used it magic to include CGI characters creating a new and more aggressive storyline. Such as newly added scenes “Patton Manhandles the 33rd Parallel” and the moving dialogue from “Abraham Lincoln’s Thanksgiving in Baghdad”. They have also included outtakes such as Wesley Clark almost starting World War III. An added feature will all you to see scenes from the upcoming production of “North Korea, I See You.”
But wait, there is more.
Order now and get the new and improved versions of World War I and II. These two DVDs are chocked full of deleted scenes such as “Battle of Pittsburgh” which was cut from the theatrical release. War scenes have been recreated using CGI effects to include a French army actually fighting with the Allies. Each DVD also includes extraordinary bonus features:
· Easter Eggs (Find Hitler’s Brain)
· Commentary from “Not So Good” kamikaze pilots
· Virtual ride on the Enola Gay
· Interactive “What Would Churchill Do?”
· Commentary from General Wesley Clark “How The Clintons Beat the Germans”
· Alternate ending “Hiroshima, Why Stop There?”
Wow, that is a lot of DVD value you say? We can’t stop. Order today and receive “Vietnam: The Director’s Cut – This Time We Win”.
But wait! There’s more. Act now, and we’ll send you free of charge The War of 1812: Unplugged That’s right. Two Gulf Wars, Two World Wars and the War of 1812 for a low, low price of only $49.95.
But act fast. Because supplies are sure to run out of this once-in-a-lifetime offer.
*Offer not valid in Syria, North Korea and West Virginia.
If you enjoyed this satire by Steve Tanner, you can read more of his work at Broken Newz.
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