I’ve Never Heard Of Those Guys

by John Hawkins | June 24, 2003 10:31 pm

I’ve Never Heard Of Those Guys: This story doesn’t really have a point, but it was so bizarre I thought it was worth mentioning….

I’m talking to this girl today and she notices I’m holding, “The Complete Idiot’s Guide to the Roman Empire[1].” Here’s about how the conversation went from there and I’m not exaggerating…

Clueless Girl: What is that book about?

John Hawkins: The Roman Empire…

Clueless Girl: What’s that?

John Hawkins: It’s about Rome — The Romans?

Clueless Girl: (Blank look)

John Hawkins: Ya know — Caesar, Marc Anthony & Cleopatra, the coliseum, people being thrown to the lions, Nero…

Clueless Girl: (Blank look) So it’s like a country?

John Hawkins: Ehr yeah — They were based out of Italy…

Clueless Girl: (Blank look) Italy?

John Hawkins: (Thinking that maybe she’s not understanding what I’m saying for some reason). Yeah, Italy — ya know I-T-A-L-Y?

Clueless Girl: (Blank look) Hmmm…

John Hawkins: (Thinking she must be joking and then realizing she’s not) Italy, it’s in Europe…

Clueless Girl: Oh Europe! I can’t believe you are reading such a thick book! I don’t read much….

Scary. Well, she did have an accent so at least I can hold out hope that America’s public education system isn’t responsible….