by Michael Illions | March 16, 2008 1:15 pm
I have been Pro-Life for as long as I could remember and it was never a religious thing for me and I am not a “Christian Conservative”, or a member of the “Religious Right”, as I am not a Christian.
So for me, it wasn’t God’s message or the Church’s teaching that I was following it was nothing more than innocent babies shouldn’t be murdered.
The big fight is about whether the Government has the right to tell a woman what she can or can not do with her body. For me, this is exactly an issue for the Government to be involved in as the Constitution guarantees every citizen the protection against Invasion and Domestic Violence. (I would say that killing an unborn life falls into “Domestic Violence.”)
The Government is protecting the unborn and their Right to Life, and the mother can do whatever she wants to do to her body, AFTER the baby is born.
My wife and I were faced with the issue of abortion when my yet to be born son, Cole, was pre-natally diagnosed with a bunch of ailments, some of which they were right about, most of which they were wrong. For us it was never a choice to make, we were having this baby, regardless of how many times the Doctor’s and geneticists told us to terminate. (You can watch “Cole’s Story” here, which I gave January 22nd in Washington, D.C.)
And since that time, my wife and I, more so my wife, talk with other parents, mostly moms, who are faced with similar prenatal issues. Believe it or not, just on a few different pregnancy groups, my wife comes across close to 15 incidents A WEEK of moms looking for advice and to tell their story.Unfortunately, about 12 of these 15 make the wrong decision and choose to abort.
But sometimes a miracle happens, and the right decision is made, and the baby will get a chance at life, no thanks to the advice of the Doctor to pursue terminating the pregnancy.
I want to share 2 stories with you, one from a mom who chose to end her pregnancy and now regrets it, and another, who discussed the situation with my wife and after talking with her husband and family, they chose life!!
This is the story of the mom who chose death:
I am not a member of this board and lurk from time to time. I was in your position in Oct. 2006. At my 18 week ultrasound my baby was diagnosed with SB-lumbral sacral and hydrochephalus. It was my fourth baby after three perfectly healthy ones. I was in shock. My baby girl was also dx’d with the Chiari formation, had the banana sign, severe hydrochephalus, etc. I DID end up terminating the pregnancy at 19 1/2 weeks. I saw a peri and also had a second opinion at a major university medical center. My main concern wasn’t even the walking issue.
The doctors had me terrified. I was told that my baby would have moderate to severe development delays (they said mental retardation, etc). Not a single dr. we spoke to expressed hope for any quality of life for our baby. My husband and I are both educated, yet blindly accepted what the doctors told us. Info. we found on the internet scared us more. We also felt that we could not burden our other three children with a severely disabled child (as put by the doctors). I went back and forth so many times and almost did not go through with it. It was and remains the worst day of my life.
I truly regret my decision and not a single minute goes by that I don’t wish I could take it back and have my baby with me now.
Much of what she said, we faced with Cole, the Doctor’s terrified us with all these predictions of doom and gloom and a poor diagnosis for Cole. This mom made the wrong decision and realized it to late. If only the Doctor’s had offered her hope and life instead of death.
Our next mom, thankfully, made the right decision:
Well, we wanted to let you all know that today we actually reached our decision. Its been really hard for us to get our heads around the fact that our daughter won’t ever be like any other ‘average’ child and that she will have ’special needs’ that will need alot of love, care, time, patience and guidance.
Different to the US, we know 9 out of 10 babies diagnosed with SB are terminated here in England, and listening to all the health professionals we know it would never be easy to care for our daughter plus not knowing what extent her brain will be damage wise its just heartbreaking.
BUT, we have actually looked at us as a whole family, including our gorgeous son and have come to the decision that we are strong enough to deal with lifes challenges and as we have been gifted with this gorgeous baby girl no matter what package she comes in, we have chosen to continue our pregnancy.
Reading all of your stories and seeing that its not the end of the world, we feel we are as prepared as we can be to deal with her needs, support her in every way possible and give ‘life’ to our daughter. Its going to be a massive learning curve for us and our families, and we’re hoping to educate everyone in the world of Spina Bifida and that being that 1 in 10 does count.
Please please keep sending messages, and we’ll be reading every day on your experiences with your little ones and we’ll let you know how things progress with our daughter.
The point of these stories is to show that it’s not as cut and dry that abortion is against the teachings of the Church, and people will not do it because of that. Some people don’t care or aren’t religious. And putting aside the Pro-Abortion advocates and organizations that push death, there is a whole movement within the medical profession that have joined in the offering of death to the unborn. That is what needs to be targeted to help offset the advice of Doctor’s to terminate pregnancies.
And my wife and I are happy to play a role in Stopping Abortion, One Baby At a Time!
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