The Mind of Mencia Tackles Illegal Immigration

Carlos Mencia, from the “Mind of Mencia,” talked about illegal immigration in his opening monologue last night. With an assist from TiVo, I was able to transcribe some of the funnier bits. Enjoy!

Cause they’re out there protesting and I heard this one lady, she got all mad.

(In a whiny voice) “I don’t understand how come the American people are not treating us like Americans.”

Um, Maybe it’s the…flag you’re holding! Mexico! Why would you hold a Mexican flag when you’re trying to tell America that you love this country? That’s like coming to my house, taking a (crap) on my table and saying, “What are you going to cook next?” Nothing!

..My dad’s from Honduras and my mom’s from Mexico and all they ever said was how beautiful Mexico is. What a paradise Honduras is. You know what I mean?

“…Mexico is better (than the United States).”

And I would be like, “Then why don’t you go back?”

“Well, it’s a very technical situation.”

It’s not a very technical situation. If you go back to Mexico, it’s not like there’s a border patrol on that side going,

“Hey hey, where are joo going?”

…There’s not even any Mexicans left over there. Have you been to Mexico lately? …Everyone is from Guatemala and El Salvador there. It’s like all the Mexicans came here, then there was nothing there, and they were like, “Well, let’s move up a little bit.”

*** Update #1 ***: You can see the video of this segment here. Go down to season 2 and click on Immigration.

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