Barack Obama Is Now Apparently Hiring Alien Shape Shifters As Security

by John Hawkins | March 22, 2013 5:07 am

Hey, Barack Obama, it’s time to put America first. Actually, scratch that; How about just putting HUMAN BEINGS first. Scratch that, how about just putting creatures native to our planet first and hiring actual HUMAN BEINGS from America instead of space aliens? Is that too much to ask? Apparently, according to some geniuses on the interwebs, it is and Barack Obama has now stooped to hiring SPACE ALIENS[1].

[2]

Having been around some Secret Service agents on duty, I can tell you that they look ready to do violence to anyone nearby at the slightest provocation already and let’s face it, they’ve done a pretty good job over the years. So, why Obama would feel the need to go outside his own species to hire security? In a time when Americans are hurting for jobs, why would Barack Obama put yet another American out of work to hire someone from another galaxy?

It just seems wrong and it’s about time someone had the courage to speak out about it. That’s why these brave souls on YouTube should be congratulated for watching this video of Barack Obama so closely. For space aliens. Standing out in the open. In the middle of a crowd. Without drawing any attention.

PS #1: Sure, it might SEEM crazy to think that Obama hired a Secret Service agent who’s an alien, but he already hired Joe Biden and would anybody be surprised he is from another planet at this point?

PS #2: Since sadly, there are many people on the Internet who don’t get irony, let me note at this point that I don’t think Barack Obama actually hired a space alien. That should at least limit the chances of this showing up as a post on the Daily Kos.