Enviromoonbat Shower Curtain That Kills

27 Apr, 2009 by Van Helsing

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According to moonbat science, water that runs down the drain doesn’t go back into the system, but pours out a pipe at the bottom of the planet, dispersing irrecoverably into outer space. This is why water conservation is so important, and why moonbats disapprove of taking showers. Jennifer Aniston limits herself to 3-minute showers. Cate Blanchett has stopped washing her hair. Other moonbats have renounced personal hygiene altogether, as can be confirmed at any left-wing rally.

But now there’s a product that allows moonbats to shower without guilt:

The idea was designed by Elisabeth Buecher who answered the question: “How can your shower fight water overconsumption in either a disturbing or a gorgeous way, using innovative materials, printing techniques and inflatable technology?” Her response: This shower curtain slowly inflates around you while you shower. It leaves you only a few minutes to take your shower before trapping you.

Moonbats who get out of the shower before being suffocated know that the indulgence was kept suitably short so as not to compromise the pious self-righteousness that is an environmentalist’s chief solace. If they stay in too long and the shower curtain gets the better of them, they’ll be prevented from exhaling any more allegedly toxic CO2. Either way, the planet wins.