I’ve Never Heard Of Those Guys

24 Jun, 2003 by John Hawkins

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I’ve Never Heard Of Those Guys: This story doesn’t really have a point, but it was so bizarre I thought it was worth mentioning….

I’m talking to this girl today and she notices I’m holding, “The Complete Idiot’s Guide to the Roman Empire.” Here’s about how the conversation went from there and I’m not exaggerating…

Clueless Girl: What is that book about?

John Hawkins: The Roman Empire…

Clueless Girl: What’s that?

John Hawkins: It’s about Rome — The Romans?

Clueless Girl: (Blank look)

John Hawkins: Ya know — Caesar, Marc Anthony & Cleopatra, the coliseum, people being thrown to the lions, Nero…

Clueless Girl: (Blank look) So it’s like a country?

John Hawkins: Ehr yeah — They were based out of Italy…

Clueless Girl: (Blank look) Italy?

John Hawkins: (Thinking that maybe she’s not understanding what I’m saying for some reason). Yeah, Italy — ya know I-T-A-L-Y?

Clueless Girl: (Blank look) Hmmm…

John Hawkins: (Thinking she must be joking and then realizing she’s not) Italy, it’s in Europe…

Clueless Girl: Oh Europe! I can’t believe you are reading such a thick book! I don’t read much….

Scary. Well, she did have an accent so at least I can hold out hope that America’s public education system isn’t responsible….