Object Under Bush Jacket Identified: ‘It’s a Spine’

A forensic scientist studying photographic evidence has identified an object which caused a bump on the back of a suit jacket worn by President George Bush during his first debate with John Forbes Kerry.

“It’s a spine,” said the unnamed scientist. “The president’s backbone, in a sense, was showing during his debate with Mr. Kerry.”

Similar images of Mr. Kerry showed “no comparable spinal features.”

When asked about the new evidence, Mr. Kerry said, “I had a spine when I defended this country as a young man, and I will have one again when I defend her as president of the United States.”

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