Illegal Alien’s Bill of Rights

President Barack Obama will soon introduce the Undocumented Resident’s Affirmative Toleration Act (URAT) in order to protect those unfortunate minorities that didn’t win life’s lottery by being born in the U.S.A. President Obama’s compassion for these downtrodden and oppressed peoples is well known, but he wants particular attention paid to those human beings that white Arizona racists have mercilessly attacked with their new ultra strict, unheard of anti-minority resident laws.

President Obama has released information of the URAT Act ahead of the scheduled press conference including the features of URAT.

The 2010 Undocumented Resident’s Affirmative Toleration Act (URAT) will summarily order the following:

  • Will protect minorities from oppressive laws such as residency requirements and will help undocumented residents receive government services
  • Will absolve undocumented workers from paying taxes
  • Will relieve undocumented residents from paying all bills
  • Will require natural born citizens to learn Spanish or Arabic so that undocumented citizens won’t have to work too hard
  • Will require hospitals, schools, and grocery stores to serve undocumented citizens for free
  • Will bestow citizenship on all family members as soon as one member has set foot on U.S. soil
  • Will automatically enroll undocumented citizens on voter rolls as Democrats unless citizen specifies otherwise
  • Will count all people living in Mexico as America citizens and enroll them in the Democrat Party unless citizens specify otherwise
  • Will waive insurance requirements and will automatically give driver’s licenses to undocumented drivers
  • Will require all schools to teach in Spanish and will eliminate American history to be replaced with La Raza approved Chicano History materials

Further Nancy Pelosi has added a section to the bill that provides for an automatic straight ticket Democrat vote for every undocumented resident that signs up for the program.

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President Obama said that if he can’t get this bill passed in the final 2010 sessions he will turn it into an Executive Order and pass it anyway. You know, like he does most things.

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