BuzzFeed writes article MOCKING gay man for not wanting sex with HIV postive partner

BuzzFeed writes article MOCKING gay man for not wanting sex with HIV postive partner

Seriously? So you are a hater if you don’t want sex with someone who has HIV? Gee, it’s really great that BuzzFeed has so enlightened all of us. First off, I just can’t condone the gay lifestyle. I’m a Christian and I consider it a sin. But if someone is gay, isn’t it survival to not want to hook up with someone who has HIV? Would you? As a straight person, would you go out of your way to get involved with someone who has an STD? Now you are a bigot if you won’t sleep with someone who has HIV. That’s stunning. It shows the propaganda that is being put out there that you should just have sex with whoever or whatever, regardless of the consequences. That’s a communist goal by the way – they want morals removed and the family unit destroyed. This is just more of that type of thinking.


From BuzzFeed News:

This is Tom Knight. He’s a 28-year-old events manager and producer from London. He’s been HIV positive since 2013.

Last week, while chatting to a man on Grindr, Knight told him he was HIV positive. The man replied that he “wasn’t ready for that kind of complication in my life”. Knight then posted his retort on Facebook.


His response, “Oh you still wear flared jeans… I’m not sure I’m ready for that kinda complication in my life,” received hundreds of likes and a stream of positive comments.


The conversation on Grindr went downhill from there. Knight wrote: “He went on to say, ‘Someone in your situation should be a bit more realistic,’ to which I replied, ‘Well the good news is my HIV can be treated. Your fashion sense however…’”

BuzzFeed News spoke to Knight about what dating is like when you’re HIV positive and the type of comments you see about the virus.

What happened on Grindr that day?

Tom Knight: I’d been talking to this guy for a few days, and he first of all asked me, “Are you clean?” I hate that term, as if HIV means you’re dirty. I just said, “I’m HIV positive.” And he didn’t reply. So I said, “If you’ve got a problem with that, fine, let’s just not talk.” And after not hearing from him for a couple of hours he said, “Oh, you’ve got HIV? I’m just not ready for that kind of complication in my life.” Which was frustrating and which was why I responded in the way that I did.

What did he say in response [to the fashion comment]?

TK: “That’s a bit immature.” I said, “Me?!” He didn’t reply again.

When someone asks if you’re “clean” are you not tempted to just ignore them?

TK: Yeah, half of me is, and the other half feels I should challenge them. I’m open about my HIV status, I’m quite a strong person, and I can deal with most crap people throw my way about it, so I’m trying to change attitudes a little bit. I like to see where such attitudes stem from, because some people make flippant comments and don’t realise what they’re saying. It can be complete ignorance; it doesn’t always come from a malicious place.

People like him don’t have any knowledge about HIV and don’t know what “undetectable” means [an undetectable viral load occurs when medication suppresses the virus to such low levels it doesn’t show up on lab tests], and don’t realise that it means you can’t pass the virus on.

How did you feel when that guy said he’s “not ready for that complication”?

TK: It’s a kick in the teeth. Every time it’s a kick in the teeth. It’s not easy telling people I’m positive. You worry about what they’re thinking about you. I get some people who are simply extremely curious about it and will ask what it’s like for me and how I’m doing. Sometimes I sense they’re not interested in pursuing anything other than a conversation after that.

I understand this man not wanting that ‘complication.’ To make fun of him for feeling that way is just insane. Having said that, it’s not about being ‘clean,’ it’s about being sick and infected. It doesn’t make you immature to be cautious on who you crawl between the sheets with. You can hardly be surprised that people avoid you if you have HIV. They don’t want to get sick and die. To mock them for that is selfish and craven. To poke fun of those who won’t risk contagion is evil in my viewpoint. They are right though, discrimination cuts both ways. They are discriminating against those who don’t want to contract HIV.


Terresa Monroe-Hamilton

Terresa Monroe-Hamilton is an editor and writer for Right Wing News. She owns and blogs at She is a Constitutional Conservative and NoisyRoom focuses on political and national issues of interest to the American public. Terresa is the editor at Trevor Loudon's site, New Zeal - She also does research at You can email Terresa here. NoisyRoom can be found on Facebook and on Twitter.

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