There’s a Hacker in the Chat!

EDITORS NOTE:: This was a prank I came up with, I had to let John Hawkins in on it. The setup was that one of us would open a chat with an unsuspecting victim and in the middle of talking pull in the other one in disguise. The two then pretend not to see eachother and interact only with the victim. This turned out beautifully. It’s definately worth a read but I wouldn’t start unless you have alot of time…. It is very lengthy, arch and I couldn’t bring ourselves to stop 🙂


EDITORS NOTE:: GODALMIGHTY And I had been chatting for about 5 minutes, this was essentially what he thought was an interview for the e-reel staff. It instead turned into a lengthy hazing… Oh well, he made the team. We were having trouble with the icq chats last night and we had to have arch in the room before god or they couldn’t see eachother. So my icq “crashed” everytime he loaded a chat. At the time god and I were discussing video games, and this is immediately after my first icq “crash”… Keep in mind I can’t see John Hawkins, who by the way is disguised as Shan_Ts00n…


Ozrael:: You there?

ShaN_Ts00n:: k

Ozrael:: coming in

ShaN_Ts00n:: k

Ozrael:: hey

Ozrael:: So where were we?

ShaN_Ts00n:: ?

GODALMIGHTY:: i dunno i forgot

GODALMIGHTY:: hi there whoever you are

ShaN_Ts00n:: huh?

Ozrael:: ahh…

Ozrael:: I’m Ozrael

ShaN_Ts00n:: How did you do that?


Ozrael:: I’m Ozrael

ShaN_Ts00n:: Hack into r chat?

GODALMIGHTY:: lol the chat lines crossed

GODALMIGHTY:: i am hacking your comp right now

Ozrael:: We were talking about the new PS2 console

ShaN_Ts00n:: Run a tracer on him Jedi

Ozrael:: What!?!

GODALMIGHTY:: i am kidding buddy geeez

Ozrael:: Why the hell would you do that?

Ozrael:: Don’t kid like that

ShaN_Ts00n:: Yah….Ya u have a hacker name

Ozrael:: …

GODALMIGHTY:: i am not a hacker

GODALMIGHTY:: don’t worry

Ozrael:: You gotta be Joshin me

ShaN_Ts00n:: u have hacker leletters in your name and how did u get into our channel then?

ShaN_Ts00n:: Where jedi?

GODALMIGHTY:: well i do minor hacking but i didn’t go into your channel on purpose

Ozrael:: Who are you talking to?

ShaN_Ts00n:: yah we will find out..jedi is tracing all your places you’ve been to get back to your server

GODALMIGHTY:: good luck buddy: (Note From John Hawkins:: I didn’t know that this was God when I showed up. I knew God was a StarCraft and Utopia Player from posts he’d made in my forums webpage. Furthermore, he had participated in a Utopia Sc Tourney and had sent me an email that had his province name and location on it. I also of course has his email, real name from the email, OS, etc. Using all that info along with some lucky guesses on my part I’m sure left God with absolutely no doubts I was a hacker)

Ozrael:: What?

ShaN_Ts00n:: he found battle net lol

Ozrael:: Dammit. We need to try this again

ShaN_Ts00n:: where did he go?

Ozrael:: He just started another chat this should be hilarious

ShaN_Ts00n:: hhehehe ok =)


Ozrael:: He wants to send the thing to my site because it will be funnier than “I Buried His Body in the Quarry” lol if only he knew… User GODALMIGHTY has entered the chat

Ozrael:: Okay you were on about the prices?

GODALMIGHTY:: f*** you again

GODALMIGHTY:: why the f*** am in your chat room again

Ozrael:: I invited you?

ShaN_Ts00n:: i don’t know but we found u….we traced ur chat down this time

GODALMIGHTY:: ohhh fun

GODALMIGHTY:: let me try

ShaN_Ts00n:: u went to battlenet today

Ozrael:: What the hell is going on?

GODALMIGHTY:: yeah thats right

ShaN_Ts00n:: and to somewhere called echelon

ShaN_Ts00n:: whatever that is…

Ozrael:: …?

Ozrael:: What’s right?

ShaN_Ts00n:: still working..hold on

ShaN_Ts00n:: hehe

Ozrael:: You there God?

User GODALMIGHTY has left the chat



User GODALMIGHTY has joined the chat

Ozrael:: Hey


GODALMIGHTY:: Ozreal you see the other guy?

Ozrael:: Now…. to the games!

ShaN_Ts00n:: I blocked that Oz guy off of my signal so he won’t disturb us =)

Ozrael:: What other guy?

ShaN_Ts00n:: watch this..OZ u suck..Oz u suck..Oz u suck

ShaN_Ts00n:: see he can’t see it =)

Ozrael:: You there man?

GODALMIGHTY:: yeah i’m here

ShaN_Ts00n:: hey what is This page has a really crappy layout

Ozrael:: Cool.

Ozrael:: So what have you heard about the Project Dolphin?

ShaN_Ts00n:: God this one is even worse..The electric reel? This one looks like it was designed by blind people (note this is Oz’s site =): EDITORS NOTE:: I HOPE YOU FALL ON A BROKEN BOTTLE ARCH

ShaN_Ts00n:: u have no taste in websites

Ozrael:: If you write an article maybe I’ll send it over to John Hawkins on BK.


Ozrael:: So when do you think you can start stuff?


GODALMIGHTY:: he is hacking my computer and making fun of your site

ShaN_Ts00n:: Is that his site? Holy crap

Ozrael:: Who?

Ozrael:: The hacker?


GODALMIGHTY:: he says it was desinged by blind people

Ozrael:: Is he still in our chats?


Ozrael:: Well, he’s obviously a retard

ShaN_Ts00n:: jedi search this guy ozs stuff

Ozrael:: who bangs chickens and goats for fun…

ShaN_Ts00n:: he’s a funny guy…watch this shiznit

Ozrael:: 5 of what?

Ozrael:: SHIT! my screen just turned f****** upside down!

ShaN_Ts00n:: blow that..hahahha


GODALMIGHTY:: sorry oz they are hacking your f****** comp

Ozrael:: Okay it’s back….

ShaN_Ts00n:: watch this….

Ozrael:: They couldn’t be!

GODALMIGHTY:: but they are

GODALMIGHTY:: so run like the wind

Ozrael:: No I have my IP hidden

GODALMIGHTY:: it don’t matter

GODALMIGHTY:: it is easy to trace

Ozrael:: They can’t hack me without it.

Ozrael:: How?

GODALMIGHTY:: oh they can


Ozrael:: What is system.ini?

Ozrael:: my comp is deleting it?

ShaN_Ts00n:: hahaha

GODALMIGHTY:: disconnect quick

ShaN_Ts00n:: he can’t

GODALMIGHTY:: they are deleting your comp

Ozrael:: S*** oh s*** what do I do?

ShaN_Ts00n:: i control the power

GODALMIGHTY:: f*ck you are mean

GODALMIGHTY:: unplug your modem

Ozrael:: I don’t know how!

ShaN_Ts00n:: It’s an internal HSP micromodem..he can’t

Ozrael:: This isn’t my CPU

GODALMIGHTY:: do you have a dial up

Ozrael:: No it’s online 24:7

ShaN_Ts00n:: too late


GODALMIGHTY:: it isn’t even his comp

Ozrael:: It’s almost to 100% what do I do?

Ozrael:: 95%

Ozrael:: S*** what do I do?

Ozrael:: 96%

GODALMIGHTY:: They are loading old windows on your comp: (Note from John Hawkins:: I added Godalmighty on my ICQ with the quotation “I’m putting you on my Friends list”. I then told him that I was installing Windows 3.1 on Oz’s system)

Ozrael:: is that bad?

Ozrael:: 97%

ShaN_Ts00n:: win 3.1 he will love it

Ozrael:: 98%

GODALMIGHTY:: they are loading windows 3.1 on your comp

ShaN_Ts00n:: done..ding ding ding

Ozrael:: 99%

ShaN_Ts00n:: Lets needs something to top it off

Ozrael:: What do I do?

Ozrael:: Hey what’s that?

GODALMIGHTY:: what does it say?

Ozrael:: My screen says I am owned by the role model for Korean youth, WTF?(Note from John Hawkins:: This is an inside joke. If you look on the humor section of the page you will see i am described this way)


ShaN_Ts00n:: les see next I’ll need his social secuity number…

ShaN_Ts00n:: 476-23-8173

ShaN_Ts00n:: now credit card number

GODALMIGHTY:: lol who is dumb enough to load that stuff

ShaN_Ts00n:: he has a banking program…

ShaN_Ts00n:: 3435 1290 9823 7624

ShaN_Ts00n:: I’m going to EBAY =) want anything?

Ozrael:: What is he doing now?

Ozrael:: I can’t unplug my computer!

GODALMIGHTY:: sure how about a new comp

Ozrael:: My start menu closed down, I can’t reboot!

Ozrael:: What are you talking about?

ShaN_Ts00n:: Serves him right =P: EDITORS NOTE:: GOD SENT ME A MESSAGE

Ozrael:: But my account isn’t online!

ShaN_Ts00n:: I just bought him an antique dollhouse it cost $995

Ozrael:: I filed my taxes online once but that’s it!

Ozrael:: What did he buy God?

GODALMIGHTY:: an antique doll house

Ozrael:: Why?

ShaN_Ts00n:: Hi Ozrael..I’m a friend of Gods..he had me hack your computer…he gave me your credit card # and told me to buy an antique doll house

Ozrael:: Hey I can see him

GODALMIGHTY:: i dunno to blow your credit cards


Ozrael:: Did you God?


GODALMIGHTY:: i don’t even know him

ShaN_Ts00n:: He wanted me to do it or I wouldn’t have

ShaN_Ts00n:: I have u on my ICQ list don’t I God?

Ozrael:: S*** I’ll be afk I gg call the credit card company brb


ShaN_Ts00n:: Watch this…wanna see me delete his entire site?

GODALMIGHTY:: no don’t

ShaN_Ts00n:: I got his pass and user for it


GODALMIGHTY:: that is just mean

ShaN_Ts00n:: I tell u any cute girls on your ICQ list? send them to me if u do and I won’t delete it

ShaN_Ts00n:: well God do u ?



GODALMIGHTY:: look at the poster girl on his website

GODALMIGHTY:: sorry bout the wait i was watching Titus

ShaN_Ts00n:: his ICQ was deleted when we switched to 3.1

ShaN_Ts00n:: Watch his site go poof

ShaN_Ts00n:: this should take just a little bit…

GODALMIGHTY:: you are mean

GODALMIGHTY:: why is your ip revealed on icq?

ShaN_Ts00n:: u think that’s the real one? =)

GODALMIGHTY:: no i tried it actually

ShaN_Ts00n:: and =)

GODALMIGHTY:: no such luck

GODALMIGHTY:: i was going to try and disconnect you to save poor oz

ShaN_Ts00n:: thought so…hey u want mac os 9.0 on your computer? I hear it rox


GODALMIGHTY:: see i can easily disconnect my comp

Ozrael:: Back… you f******!

GODALMIGHTY:: from the wonderful internet

GODALMIGHTY:: _hey oz save yourself yet


Ozrael:: He was also nice enough to buy me 375 copies of The Catcher in the Rye!

ShaN_Ts00n:: but u will have to reconnect some time and if u don’t want to format

ShaN_Ts00n:: i got access

ShaN_Ts00n:: I heard it was a good book =)


GODALMIGHTY:: want it thanks

GODALMIGHTY:: oz your credit card ok?

ShaN_Ts00n:: (At this point Oz actually took down his website main page and put up a basic page saying “This page is owned by the Role Model For the Youth of Korea” among other things. I wanted a copy but I think he lost it”


ShaN_Ts00n:: check it out I improved it =)

Ozrael:: What can I do, yeah I cancelled everything.

Ozrael:: What did you do?

Ozrael:: HOLY S*** MY SITE!

ShaN_Ts00n:: it looks much better that way

ShaN_Ts00n:: I’m sorry but God said u were an @ss and told me to do that


Ozrael:: What?

Ozrael:: God I didn’t have backups!

Ozrael:: Who are you!

GODALMIGHTY:: i had nothing to do with it

ShaN_Ts00n:: I deleted everything but that too hahahah

Ozrael:: Christ I’m going to have to start over

ShaN_Ts00n:: How lucky u are that I improved your operating system hahahahaha

Ozrael:: Who is this guy God? did you piss him off or something?


GODALMIGHTY:: he latched on our chat

ShaN_Ts00n:: I didn’t want to but God said he would hack me if I didn’t


Ozrael:: This is what the fourth one!?

ShaN_Ts00n:: God keeps adding me after u 2 chat (which is actually what OZ was doing =)

GODALMIGHTY:: the fourth what?

ShaN_Ts00n:: that’s how I get in each time


Ozrael:: Chat

Ozrael:: But I haven’t seen you up until now

GODALMIGHTY:: he latched on my ip and auto adds himself it is a hack

ShaN_Ts00n:: Oh yeah no such hack exists

GODALMIGHTY:: oh they do

ShaN_Ts00n:: Oz he added me seperately on ICQ so I could see u but u couldn’t see me

GODALMIGHTY:: btw what is the answer to the riddle?


ShaN_Ts00n:: God told me too..sorry man

ShaN_Ts00n:: I am his brother in RL

GODALMIGHTY:: no you aren’t

Ozrael:: I don’t know who to believe!

ShaN_Ts00n:: me me me!

ShaN_Ts00n:: I’ve buried peoples bodies in the quarry for less than this…

Ozrael:: That’s it I’m going to get my friend Jedi to sort this out

Ozrael:: He’ll know

ShaN_Ts00n:: -_-

ShaN_Ts00n:: and taken their TVS…

Ozrael:: S*** My contact list is gone!

Ozrael:: I can’t message Jedi!

ShaN_Ts00n:: what about John Hawkins? Can u get him?

Ozrael:: No he’s a loser

ShaN_Ts00n:: My God this is as funny as one of the ICQ pranks on his page…

ShaN_Ts00n:: hahahahahahahahahahahah

Ozrael:: I can’t get anyone

Ozrael:: …

Ozrael:: better than “Buried His Body in the Quarry?

ShaN_Ts00n:: God is on my list want his ICQ #?

Ozrael:: no I’m fine 🙂

ShaN_Ts00n:: Not quite that good

GODALMIGHTY:: he has mine

Ozrael:: Welcome to the e-Reel staff God…

Ozrael:: lol

Ozrael:: lmfaorotfpmosupiafol


ShaN_Ts00n:: =[

Ozrael:: laughing my f****** ass off rolling on the floor pissing my own soiled pants in a fit of laughter

ShaN_Ts00n:: Oz made me do it..I tried to tell him it was morally wrong but he said go ahead

ShaN_Ts00n:: hahaha

Ozrael:: Good one Arch

Ozrael:: lol


Ozrael:: I can’t stop laughing

GODALMIGHTY:: what is going on i am deeply confused now

Ozrael:: God, you are now the subject of the best ICQ prank yet

GODALMIGHTY:: oh f*** you guys

ShaN_Ts00n:: It is I The role model for the youth of Korea, Bad Mama Jama and webmaster of God’s favorite net publication John Hawkins

Ozrael:: Ozrael and John Hawkins have teamed up

GODALMIGHTY:: s*** now i will be the laughing stock of both sites

Ozrael:: Nah… you made the cut

ShaN_Ts00n:: My god this was funny =)

Ozrael:: toooo funny

Ozrael:: sorry man

Ozrael:: I’m still laughing

ShaN_Ts00n:: I didn’t even know this was u God until I got into chat =)

Ozrael:: afk, I need to roll on the floor some more

GODALMIGHTY:: yeah well thanks

ShaN_Ts00n:: and I didn’t actually do any hacking of course =)

GODALMIGHTY:: i even made that annoying bot in your forum

Ozrael:: Still interested in writing for the Reel?

GODALMIGHTY:: yeah sure

Ozrael:: lol

Ozrael:: still laughing

ShaN_Ts00n:: oh it’s a fun thing God…u r famous now

GODALMIGHTY:: i figured it out after i found the real site hidden in index1EDITORS NOTE:: …LIAR 🙂

Ozrael:: very famous

Ozrael:: Really?


Ozrael:: there is no index 1

GODALMIGHTY:: very convincing though

GODALMIGHTY:: i saw an index3 in my history

ShaN_Ts00n:: all bullsh*t and mirrors =)

GODALMIGHTY:: i know that

GODALMIGHTY:: but very funny

Ozrael:: still laughing…

GODALMIGHTY:: i was laughing at poor oz over there the whole time too


ShaN_Ts00n:: I think so that role model for Korea’s youth should of tipped u off if u had read page carefully


ShaN_Ts00n:: that’s a description under my name in humor

GODALMIGHTY:: aggghhh i feel stupid

GODALMIGHTY:: yet at the same time very amused

Ozrael:: This was beautiful.

ShaN_Ts00n:: now I gotta finish formatting the joke someone played on weatherlight for tonights issue..don’t feel was funny =)

GODALMIGHTY:: i gotta jet cya later

ShaN_Ts00n:: l8tr

Ozrael:: laterz

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