Mini-Movie Review — The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

As regular readers of RWN are aware, I am a big fan of horror movies and so it was a given that I was going to see the remake of “Texas Chainsaw Massacre”. But truth be told, despite the fact this movie did 29.1 million dollars right out of the gate, I can’t recommend it to the other horror junkies out there.

Now why do I say that? Was it because of the plot? No, it’s not that. The plot was a standard one for a slasher flick. Five kids happen upon some psychos and try to survive through the night. While that’s not exactly the stuff legendary films are made of, it’s perfectly acceptable for a horror movie.

Well what about the production values? They were excellent. The acting? For a horror movie, the acting was fine. The chief villain? Leatherface is a classic, just like Jason or Freddy.

So why can’t I recommend this movie to you even though I wouldn’t call it a bad film? Simply put, the movie breaks absolutely no new ground. There’s not one scene, one character, one moment in this movie that feels creative, fresh, or new. It’s a classic slasher flick– like the original — so much so that you feel like you’re seeing a movie that’s two decades behind the times.

I mean how many times have we seen a bunch of teenagers picked off by some maniac who wants to kill them with a machete, axe, or chainsaw? How many horror movies have featured a bunch of weird family members? How many times have we seen chases through the woods and teenagers hiding and hoping not to be discovered by the main bad guy? Everything about this movie from beginning to end just leaves you with the feeling of “been there, done that, got the t-shirt”.

So, even though this isn’t a bad horror film, it’s not a good one either. So I cannot recommend that you go see it in the theater, although it may be worth checking out on video down the road if you’re looking for something semi-scary that you haven’t seen yet. Thumbs down…

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