Patton For President!

I took some more Patton pics while I was on vacation and I must say, I have the coolest dog in the entire blogopshere by far. Just check this picture out…

It’s almost as if he’s saying, “Am I not the most adorable dog in the entire blogosphere? Only an idiot or a Commie could say no. It’s almost like I’m SMILING AT YOU. Can your dog do that, you hippy? Oh? Then get it on film…no, no, go ahead, I’ll just sit here and wait while you get your effeminate French Poodle who’d probably vote for Al Sharpton if he were human and try to teach him to smile. I’m waiting…la, la, la, la, la…oh, it does get tiresome having my belly scratched and chasing toys while you try to get a cute shot of “Poochy” or “Socks” or whatever you’ve named your third rate mongrel who doesn’t measure up to me — oh — did I say that out loud? Besides, it’s probably just a fluke shot; I could never do it again…

Oops, I did it again! How did I manage that? So how’s that pic of “Ratty the Chihuahua” coming? Too busy scratching himself to take a cute pic, eh? Let’s face facts; shall we? Howard Dean has a better chance of beating President Bush than your dog has of taking a better pic than me…and take my word for it, I plan to be eating filet mignon and playing with my favorite squeaky toy when George Bush does the same thing to Howard Dean that I’m doing to this toy…

I mean, we’re friends here; I can be honest with you; right? I COULD beat Howard Dean! My campaign commercial would open up with this pic…

The announcer says, “Hey Patton, what do you think of taxes?”


“What about deficit spending, boy? What do you think about politicians who fritter away the American people’s hard earned money on pork barrel spending?”


“But can we trust you to defend our national security? What do you want to do to terrorists, boy?”


“Vote Patton; he’ll keep spending down, won’t raise your taxes, and he’ll take a bite out of terrorism! Sure he may be a dog, but come on…Howard Dean? You’ve gotta be kidding me!”

President Patton…that has a nice ring to it. I’ll have to think about that tomorrow while I’m chewing on my pig nose and playing fetch! Rowf!

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