Author: John Hawkins

Riding Charlie Sheen’s Corpse Into The Ground

Posted on by John Hawkins

Charlie Sheen: He’s pumping Tiger Blood, man! He’s winning! He’s a rock star from Mars! He’ll make your face melt off! Wheeeeee! Go to his live shows! Give him a new TV show! This guy is really exciting now! Cheer him on! That’s in front of the cameras. Behind the cameras, here’s what it’s like: […]

 

The Story Of The Toughest Son Of A B*Tch Ever To Walk The Face Of This Earth

Posted on by John Hawkins

Forrest Griffin is one funny dude. Yes, that Forrest Griffin. The UFC Fighter. I’m laughing my way through Got Fight?: The 50 Zen Principles of Hand-to-Face Combat right now, but there’s one story from the book that is SO GOOD, I just had to share. The story is about manliness, how to respond to bullies, […]

 

Does The Obama Administration Realize That Americans Speak English?

Posted on by John Hawkins

If you were born in this country, you should be able to speak English, even if it’s just ebonics. Even to become a naturalized American citizen, you need to take an English test to prove you have a certain level of proficiency with English. So, if you’re talking with someone who has so little command […]

 

Scott Walker, Wisconsin, Republicans, And Americans Win. Democrats and Unions Lose.

Posted on by John Hawkins

Ostensibly, Scott Walker was up against Tom Barrett yesterday in Wisconsin. In actuality, his opponents were the unions. He was their great and cheesy boogeyman because he dared to put the interests of the state of Wisconsin above the interests of the union. Liberals loved getting another crack at Walker until he whomped Barrett like […]

 

Seven Reasons Why Mitt Romney Is The Favorite In November

Posted on by John Hawkins

As someone who mocked Romney mercilessly during the primaries and co- founded NotMittRomney.com, I can’t be accused of being a water carrier for Mitt. Moreover, I wouldn’t walk back a single word I said about him, including the fact that he’s the least electable GOP candidate since Goldwater. Yet and still, despite what you’re hearing […]

 

World’s Most Predictable Headline: “Buyers’ Remorse For California’s ‘Bullet Train To Nowhere'”

Posted on by John Hawkins

Who would have ever suspected that a state headed rapidly towards bankruptcy would ever come to regret spending billions on a marginally useful bullet train that’s practically guaranteed to be a money losing disappointment? Ambitious plans for a fast track linking Los Angeles and San Francisco at speeds of up to 220mph in just over […]

 

Milton Friedman In 2003 Vs. George Soros Today On The Euro

Posted on by John Hawkins

In talking about the Euro, George Soros had this to say. The European Union is “like a bubble” — not a financial bubble but a political bubble — that could pop as a result of the euro -zone crisis, Soros said. “In the boom phase, the EU was what the psychoanalyst David Tuckett calls a […]

 

The Most Unintentionally Disturbing Column About A Divorce You’ll Ever Read

Posted on by John Hawkins

You ever see one of those horror movies where things appear superficially normal, but out of the corner, you catch sight of disturbing things that let you know things just aren’t right? The shadow in the wrong place. A hint of movement, a twisted reflection in a window pane? That’s sort of like this column […]

 

My 25 Favorite Tweets For May

Posted on by John Hawkins

Just saw @NadiaNaffe follows @BreitbartUnmask & worked w/ @ronbryn. Was her whole attack on @JamesOKeefeIII a Kimberlin operation? — John Hawkins (@johnhawkinsrwn) May 25, 2012 High self esteem coupled with mediocrity is actually considerably worse than low self-esteem. — John Hawkins (@johnhawkinsrwn) May 12, 2012 There’s a simple reason the media’s never made a serious […]

 

Twenty Things this Conservative Believes

Posted on by John Hawkins

1) Any illegal alien caught in this country should be forever barred from legally visiting this country, working here, or becoming an American citizen. 2) If you take welfare or food stamps or if your kids have to get free meals at school, you should be ashamed. Your kids should feel ashamed by your failure, […]

 

Why GM and Chrysler Had To Be Bailed Out And Are Doomed Over The Long Haul

Posted on by John Hawkins

If you want to understand what went wrong with GM and Chrysler and what’s still wrong with both of those companies, and to a lesser extent, Ford, it’s not hard to understand. 1) The unions give lots of money and manpower to the Democratic Party. In return, the Democratic Party has given unions way too […]

 

Medical Marijuana That Even Drug Warriors Could Back

Posted on by John Hawkins

Let’s be honest; The overwhelming majority of people who support or use medical marijuana do it because they want to get high. Of course, most of them deny that. Well, the good news is that happily, it may soon become a moot point… Israeli scientists have cultivated a cannabis plant that doesn’t get people stoned […]

 

“Being 30 and Living With Your Parents Isn’t Lame – It’s Awesome.” — Ehr No, It Is Actually Lame

Posted on by John Hawkins

There’s actually a column at Time, I kid you not, extolling the virtues of being 30 years old and living with your parents. Just how much of a bummer is it to be well past the age of adulthood and still living under your parent’s roof? As this living arrangement grows increasingly common, the perception […]

 

The Ugly Truth About The Middle Class And Taxes In America

Posted on by John Hawkins

No politician on the Right or the Left is going to tell the truth about the middle class. There are just too many of them. So, we’re going to continue to be told that the middle class is undertaxed. That’s just not true. It would be true if we actually had the amount of government […]

 

5 Great Pieces Of R-Rated Life Advice from the Movies

Posted on by John Hawkins

1) “Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.” — The Princess Bride Life is struggling and failing, worrying about money, having to do things you don’t want to do for people you don’t like, getting your heart broken, losing friends, having people you love die, getting hit with health problems, and […]

 

For Future Generations: The Zombie Outbreak Started In Miami, Florida.

Posted on by John Hawkins

Isn’t this how zombie movies always seem to start? The naked Miami man who was shot dead after allegedly being found eating another man’s face in a drug-induced rage has been identified. Oh, so the guy was filled with “rage” and he was eating another person in broad daylight? That ring any bells? British animal […]

 

Chris Hayes Just Said What Most Liberals Really Think

Posted on by John Hawkins

“Thinking today and observing Memorial Day, that’ll be happening tomorrow. Just talked with Lt. Col. Steve Burke [sic, actually Beck], who was a casualty officer with the Marines and had to tell people [inaudible]. Um, I, I, ah, back sorry, um, I think it’s interesting because I think it is very difficult to talk about […]

 

The 25 Best Quotes From American Soldiers

Posted on by John Hawkins

25) “Don’t fire until you see the whites of their eyes!” — William Prescott at the Battle Of Bunker Hill 24) “To be prepared for war is one of the most effective means of preserving peace.” — George Washington 23) “When this war is over, the Japanese language will be spoken only in hell!” — […]

 

How Many American Citizens Are BeingThreatened By Cartels On The Border?

Posted on by John Hawkins

Americans citizens are being victimized, threatened, and sometimes even killed by illegal immigrants. They’re victims of our government’s intentional refusal to secure our border. It’s not that we can’t secure the border — we certainly can. The truth is that there are businessmen with deep pockets who profit from illegals and Democrats who want as […]

 

The Best Quotes From Jonah Goldberg’s “The Tyranny of Cliches: How Liberals Cheat in the War of Ideas”

Posted on by John Hawkins

From The Tyranny of Cliches: How Liberals Cheat in the War of Ideas. We have now sunk to a depth at which the restatement of the obvious is the first duty on intelligent men. — George Orwell, P.1 After an eighteen-month campaign, all of the informed, conscious, and ideologically consistent voters have already made up […]

 

Interviewing Robert Stacy McCain About Brett Kimberlin

Posted on by John Hawkins

Robert Stacy McCain, who blogs at RWN on occasion, has become a story himself this week. After reporting on “Speedway Bomber” Brett Kimberlin, Stacy announced to the world that Kimberlin had been in touch with his wife’s employer and that he had moved his family out of their house as a result. Quite naturally, this […]

 

The Top 20 Reasons To Vote For Barack Obama In 2012 According To Liberals

Posted on by John Hawkins

1) Mormons are scary! Ooooh, magic underwear! Multiple wives! They probably hate black people and were behind something or another awful that happened 150 years ago! 2) Obviously Republicans hate women like Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann! Wait, bad examples…uhm, let’s see, they kill female babies, put women’s faces on pinatas and beat them, and […]

 

San Francisco Consults Harvey Milk By Ouija board Before Trying To Convince The Navy To Name A Ship After Him

Posted on by John Hawkins

In an extraordinarily bizarre turn of events, one of the most anti-military cities in America, San Francisco, wants the Navy to name a ship after left wing politician Harvey Milk. In Milk’s defense, he did serve in the military and rose to the level of lieutenant, junior grade. On the other hand, Harvey Milk’s claim […]