In A Closed Session Today, The General Assembly Of The United Nations Debated The Fate Of Captured Iraqi Dictator Saddam Hussein By Rip Rowan

In a closed session today, the General Assembly of the United Nations debated the fate of captured Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein. “The United Nations cannot support the death penalty under any circumstance,” said UN Secretary-General Kofi Annan. “The death penalty is a cruel and barbaric punishment now used only by the most backwards of peoples. […]

 

My Favorite 100 Movies Of All-Time

Just as a little change of pace from all the news about Saddam and the wacky leftists who have been driven over the edge by his capture, I thought I’d start things out today with my favorite 100 movies of all time. 100) Tommy Boy 99) Pearl Harbor 98) Star Wars: Episode I — The […]

 

PETA Lies To Children About Their Mommies

According to the Boston Herald, ” (PETA) will single out small children at performances of “The Nutcracker” in the next few weeks by handing out fliers… …Lisa Franzetta, a national coordinator for PETA, said the group will launch its “fur-ocious” protest at `Nutcracker’ performances in as many as 20 cities across the United States.” Oh […]

 

FDA Panel Approves OTC ‘Morning-Before’ Pill By Scott Ott

A Food and Drug Administration (FDA) panel has approved over-the-counter sales of the so-called ‘morning-before’ pill. Although experts disagree over how the pill works, it seems to prevent unwanted pregnancy by attacking the problem at its source in the human brain. The drug is an emergency pre-emptive contraceptive known as “Plan A”, which, when taken […]

 





Thanks To Glenn Beck!

I just wanted to give a quick thank you to Glenn Beck for sending me an autographed copy of his book. He’s not the first person to send me a free book, but no one else has actually taken the time to autograph the book before they sent it out. That’s appreciated, especially coming from […]

 





10-Year Quest to ‘Free Willy’ Finally Succeeds By Scott Ott

A decade-long, multimillion dollar effort to ‘Free Willy’ has finally succeeded. The beloved movie star killer whale, whose real name was Keiko, captured the hearts and minds of the global community as environmentalists attempted to mimic the finale of the movie by returning the captive orca to his natural environment. “We’re happy to announce that […]

 



We Got Saddam!

I don’t normally post on Sundays, but in this case I’ll make a short, triumphant, exception… We got Saddam, hey…we got Saddam, hey…we got Saddam, hey! This is fantastic news for our troops overseas, for the Iraqi people, and for all Americans! Furthermore, I just can’t wait to catalogue the gloomy “this means nothing,” “this […]

 





The Non-Existent Global Warming Body Count

These sort of wild claims about global warming are so pathetic that they don’t even qualify as “junk science” in my opinion… “U.N.: 150,000 deaths tied to warmer world As negotiators on a global warming pact ran into new obstacles Thursday, a U.N. agency estimated that 150,000 deaths in 2000 were tied to warmer temperatures […]

 

Quote Of The Day: Carville Slams Dean

When you have perhaps the most diehard Democratic partisan on the planet, James Carville, saying this about the man who’s probably going to be his party’s nominee, you have to think the Democrats are going to be in a lot of trouble in 2004… “I told Steve McMahon, the media guy for Dean, who was […]

 


STUDY: Violent Video Games Turn Teens Into Fat, Weak Killing Machines By Shamus Young

A new study released by the Institute for Responsible Entertainment revealed today that today’s “hyper violent” video games cause teens to spend hours in a limp, slack-jawed state of simulated mayhem. Dr. Colin Jenkins, who performed the study said, “It is truly alarming… these kids spend hours playing what ammounts to a murder simulator, while […]

 


No Prime Contracts For Fairweather Friends

Our fairweather friends who were shut out of the prime contracts in Iraq have started complaining about how we’re going to spend OUR MONEY. How dare we reward nations like Poland and Australia that risked their blood and treasure to support us while penalizing nations like France and Germany that did everything they could think […]

 


Toasting The Lack Of Anti-Semitism In Europe With Adolph Hitler Wine

Anti-Semitism in Europe? No way, nope, couldn’t be. They just loathe the Israelis, not Jews…isn’t that basically what we keep hearing? Christmas sales of Adolf Hitler wine have reached a record high thanks to publicity generated by attempts to ban it in both Brussels and Berlin. Wine-grower Alessandro Lunardelli started selling the bottles of Hitler […]